Wednesday, December 18, 2019

What kind of shoes?

I remember a time in the 70's as a young athlete when we didn't know whether to pronounce these new sports shoes with two syllables or one -- Nike.  My very first pair of sport shoes were basketball shoes, but they were low-tops and they were white leather with a black Pony logo.  I remember the exact spot I was in at the athletic shop...... such shoes were only at specialty sports shops back then and not available on every corner of the mall like they are now.   I've had my share of Converse, Asics, and Nike, etc.  I've also had heels and nice dress shoes/boots for church and work throughout the years, but my favorite kind of shoe to shop for, purchase, own, and wear are athletic shoes.  LOVE them!   It is in such shoes where I am me, Windy.  I wonder what kind of shoes that you feel most comfortable in or are enamored by....... or do you prefer bare feet at home?

What's the big deal about shoes, do you have a fetish, Windy?   No, I do not, but I would like to talk about the metaphorical shoes we sometimes wear.  The best way for me to describe how my body and brain react to new-to-me information, certain kinds of over-stimulation, and inconsistency/change  is this:

Pretend you go to a grocery store that you have never been to before.  As soon as you walk in, take the myopic glasses that are about 3 times your own prescription strength and put them on your beautiful ttwd face.  (They're in your purse already because I put them there! We're imagining!)

Immediately your world is off kilter.  Even though it is only your vision that is being distorted, your head starts to get fuzzy and hurt behind your eyes, you almost immediately have a hard time thinking of what you're even looking for because your brain is so over-focused on not being able to see your environment in focus.

Now, unsteadily, you reach for a grocery cart.  Take a few steps until you realize that you just picked a cart with a bum wheel.  You now have to decide whether to take the cart back and get a new one or keep going.  You keep going because it's too much to think about.  So you and your lopsided cart can only see things close up and way too big.  Visually, you're taking everything in that is within a ten foot reach, but you can see nothing but blurry colors and general shapes beyond that.  Be careful when you're reaching for that big can of white premium chunk chicken otherwise you'll accidentally grab the tuna in oil and no one wants a greasy tuna casserole for dinner tonight, I'm assuming.

Has that slightly nagging nausea kicked in for you yet?  Now slam into somebody's cart on accident, apologize, and have it not really be accepted by the stranger.  Now look down at your list, close one eye to see if you can make out any words whatsoever through the thick glasses.  You can't.  So you're thinking you will to do the rest of your grocery shopping by memory of what you wrote on the list.  Then you realize that you didn't write the list.  Your significant other did....... and you are only vaguely aware of what was on the list.   Did you notice the most annoying elevator music playing yet? 

Now, take off the glasses because we don't want you throwing up in the grocery store.  Things start to look a lot better, but it will take your body the rest of your shopping trip, a careful drive home in the car, some variation of Dramamine, and a cat nap once home to feel like yourself again.  Whew!

Life for me holds times where I feel like I am wearing those awful glasses, but mostly it has felt like I just took them off and my body and my mind are trying to readjust to the stimuli in this world whether it be natural, or created or caused by man.  It's about having the sensory feeling that I have worn somebody else's prescription trifocals all day while still trying to fully function to a satisfactory degree, and to correctly process and interpret the actions and words of others.  It affects my perceptions and my emotions and often puts me in a position of self defense.  What is a true threat?  What is not?  Who is friend and who is foe?  The horizon cannot appear in my field of vision soon enough to settle my equilibrium in both a visual and emotional sense.

I decided decades ago that  if I am going to search for anything in my life, it would be consistency and safety.  The rate at which some people changed their minds, weren't honest about their motives, can't figure out where they're going in life and stay there for at least a little while has shaken me to my core from the time I was just a little girl.  It helps me when people do what they say they are going to do and completely puts me in a spin when they don't.  Add that to my equilibrium issues, I need sure footing both physically and emotionally.  Who doesn't?

While most of my family, friends, and acquaintances throughout the years see me as strong in character and in the face of some health adversities, I realize that there are some people in my life who may think that I overreact in my writing, that I seem to feel things too deeply, that I am too sensitive, or that I feel threatened when there is not really a danger.  Maybe they're right.  I don't know what it is like to be anybody else.  I only know what it feels like to be in my own body, mind, and spirit.  But, we all need to be careful in thought and in words because we don't truly know what most people are dealing with in their lives, with their families, and with their physical and mental health.  And to that, I ask,  "If you imagine walking 18 grocery aisles  in my dizzy shoes, how do you think it would alter your perception of the people and things around you?"

Now, I'd like to ask about your shoes.  Maybe some of you would compare times in your life where you're walking around in 4 inch heals that you like to wear out for a nice dinner with your man, but maybe you feel unsteady and that life is a little wobbly for you at times and you'd like for others to understand that analogy in your life.   Or maybe you feel you've spent too much time feeling like you're wearing an old pair of bowling shoes.... ones that too many people have worn and are now all slippery on the bottom and have no traction whatsoever.  Perhaps you like to wear nice sandals or flip-flops and love to feel the heat of the sun on your feet because it connects you to nature and you feel warm inside because of it and that makes you feel at your most authentic self.   Etc.......

What shoes would you like others to put on to help them understand you a little better?

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

Put on your Thinking Cap

Please join me in remembering when we were in kindergarten or grade one when we heard our teachers say for the first time in a quiet yet steady encouraging voice, "Okay, children, let's put on our thinking caps."   My little mind scrambled.  Did yours?  Thinking cap?  Is there one in my desk?  Little curious butterflies flit around in my tummy.  Is a friend holding it for me in her plastic purple zipper pencil case?   Remember how we sat on our hands to contain our excitement?   Is the teacher going to pass them out?  No one ever took the time to tell any of us that we even had a thinking cap!  Thanks a lot Mom and Dad!  But, almost immediately, our young minds quickly assimilated that this was an imaginary game even though we wished very very hard that those thinking caps might somehow turn out to be very real.  I don't know about your teacher, but mine was especially convincing at pantomiming the putting on of her thinking cap, AND, she even tied the bow under her chin!  I imagined that hers would be a thinking rain cap and I didn't know what mine was, but I was certain it would not be one of those dumb white swimming caps girls with long hair had to wear at the public pool in the 70's.  Those were embarrassing!

Telling us to put on our thinking caps was our teacher's way of saying, "We're going to learn something new, and I think you're smart, so let's figure this out together!"  Somewhere around 4th grade, however, this game became embarrassing instead of fun.  We worried about what our friends would think if we did the motions of putting on our thinking caps along with the teacher.  Would they think us babies?   So the thinking cap fantasy went away along with the belief in Santa Claus even though we might yet follow that Elf on the Shelf around the house for another few years just because it was still fun and no one was there to make fun of you.  Your older brothers and sisters might give you  hard time, but even they most likely still got a kick out of finding the little fellas hiding around the house every morning during the month of December.

Sometimes I'd like to lend my thinking cap to other stupid people and yes, I include myself there because I don't claim to know much although I know I am less ignorant than many current  members of Congress.  I think all voting polls across America should pass out thinking caps before we get to vote in 2020.  Forget the voter ID laws this year........ I say if you show up with a thinking cap that you took the time to make yourself, that should be enough to say you care enough about the importance of voting.  HA!

I also like the idea of borrowing a thinking cap or lending one to a friend or even a stranger.  That way, your friend can see exactly how you're feeling about a certain situation if she is struggling to understand. And here is the thing -- if you hand your special hat to your friend, relative, etc. and she can't seem to fit it on her big fat inflated sense of self or little skinny, narrow-minded head, then that is a sign right there that the two of you should go your separate ways.  In the very least, we should be able to partially tug down someone else's hats on our head and appreciate one another's points of view.  Should husband and wives be able to try on each other's thinking caps for size?  I'm not even going there tonight........

Maybe sometimes the hat you borrow or give will be tattered and worn. This could be because the person has grown weary with more thinking than does Winnie the Pooh when he has misplaced his pot of honey.  Or maybe it looks brand new so you think perhaps the person doesn't think very much at all and must have never even worn it.  However, looks can be deceiving. Perhaps the person wears it all the time, but just takes really good extra care of it, hand washes it only, and never ever sticks it in a warm dryer or tries to climb through Rabbit's door hole that is smaller than one's honey-stuffed tummy.

Even though I only write a blog and I am not a published author (yet!), I often have to put on my thinking cap and allow myself to think both whimsically or sincerely and deeply depending on the topic.  In the meantime, I want this hat:

But some of you might want this one:  

If you're slightly annoyed with this post and you don't care what I do with my thinking cap, then I imagine that you can guess that I don't give a fig where you can gingerly (wink) stuff yours. 

Sunday, December 1, 2019

It's Like Comparing Storm's Balls!

At times when I have been a little flustered at home, Storm will approach me and gently lift one or both of my boobs with his hand(s) and he asks me, "Does this help?"   And my answer is always, "Yes, it does, Honey," because as far as I am concerned, the man can touch me whenever, wherever, and however he wants.  He and I have always openly shared anything about our bodies with one another.  Storm especially likes seeing such parts; we often flirt and joke about them.

While preparing Thanksgiving treats, I can't remember the context, but I smarted off to Storm with a teasing tone as I said the word, "apples." He immediately responded with, "I'll show you some apples!"   (We have FOREVER been making that kind of verbal joke.  One of us is always saying that we're going to show the other one some body part called by the name of something innocent, such as apples.  You can imagine what is compared to a banana and I will tell you that I often call my own boobs avocados.)

I respond to him, "You don't have apples, you have plums. "  I add, "And they don't smell like apples."
Him, "I've got crab apples."  He pauses and then, "Do they smell like crabs?"    GEEEZE.  No, they just smell like guy's  balls although I've only been up close and personal with Storm's and no one else's, so I am assuming there is a similar scent with all guys.   I did learn what they smelled like in not such a good way (is there a good way?!)  when I was in high school.

I was a teacher's aide for my coach for one period of the day.  He needed a video tape of the game or something from the boys' locker room, so he gave me the key and I went to fetch it.   There was no danger of anybody else being in there because it was during the school day plus it was locked.  I had never been in there before.  It was similar to the girls' locker room, but a lot larger to accommodate all the football players at once, I imagine.  But, that wasn't the first thing I noticed.  After turning the key in the lock, I walk in and look around to see where the coach's office within that locker room was and I walked into an invisible wall of something that I had never smelled before, but somehow I instantly knew what it was.  Well, sort of.  I thought it was testosterone because our girls' locker room did not smell like this.   I wrinkled up my nose, power walked through the cloud and muttered,  "Ugh!  Disgusting!" 

Since that day, I find it difficult to see a football game on television without thinking of what their locker room smells like immediately after a game.  BLAH!  All those balls and wieners bouncing around.   I'm sure they all clean up just fine afterwards, but underneath that clean soapy and male cologne post shower atmosphere lies that testosterone and male sweat smell that lingers in those locker rooms and on their football shoulder pads, and God knows what else!  The team manager never got much respect in any sport that I knew of, but the ones who manage football teams and their stinky equipment definitely should earn a varsity letter!

Before I segue into the second part of this post, I need to explain about this guy we used to know.  I'm going to change his name though to something fictional.   Let's see...... actually, I am just going to call him Chris Matthews because that is who he reminds me of from MSNBC news.  He looks like him, except he's bigger and he has dark hair, and his mouth runs just as fast as Chris Matthews' does and somehow only manages to make about half the sense .... and he is just the loudest motor mouth known to mankind.

So Chris Matthews and Storm used to play on the same men's fast pitch softball team.  Storm was often the pitcher and Chris was often the catcher.  But, Chris is a heavy guy and couldn't handle the stress on his knees every game, so during those times, Storm would be the catcher.

This would be an important time to point out that during this time when this specific thing happened, Storm and I were only dating. Once we were married is when I found out about it and put an immediate end to such an event ever occurring again!

When Storm was getting ready for his softball games, he'd put on his jock strap, which as  new wife, I was never exposed to such things and not having any brothers growing up, I thought the jock strap was absolutely hilarious looking.  When he put it on, I laughed because I expected them to look something like men's underwear, but instead, his buns were just bare with these straps wrapped around them in order to hold everything else in the front.  Except Storm didn't wear a cup.  I asked him why would he wear a jock strap with no cup and he said it was to keep his balls and wiener from flopping around.  Okay... whatever....... but then he said, "Except when I play catcher, then I wear a cup."   Me, "Well, why don't you have a cup?"   He said he just uses the one in the TEAM bat bag.  EWWWWWWWWWWW!    Heck, no!!!!! 

So that memory from over 30 years ago revisited us today.  Because of all the joking about his apples, plums, and balls, I said, "I can't believe your balls have been in the same place as Chris Matthews' balls have been!"

And Storm choked on a laugh, "You've had Chris Matthews' balls in your mouth?"   Ah, GEEZE.   We couldn't stop laughing, but I did stop smarting off for the evening!

Sunday, November 24, 2019

Storm and Windy's Weekend - What We are Reading

Okay, I doubt this will be a weekly post with this heading and subject matter, but I might shoot for monthly and in the very least, an occasional weekend. Today, I'll keep it simple and share with you the latest books I have read and my brief opinion on each, but no spoilers.

A Woman is no Man -  Written by Etaf Rum from the perspective of a Palestinian-American woman about how women treat one another within their culture whether in Pakistan or in Brooklyn.    If you have read A Thousand Splendid Suns, then I'd say you don't need to read this one.  Both books are of a similar tough subject to read.

The Giver of Stars -  I enjoyed this book by Jojo Moyes thoroughly and I would recommend it for sure.  It is historical with a little romance here and there, but that is not the main thrust of the book, pun intended.   It is about a group of lady librarians who delivered books by horseback in Kentucky as part of Eleanor Roosevelt's traveling library.  I found it a fairly light and quick yet descriptive read.

I just finished reading The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides over the weekend and I LOVED it.  I'ts contemporary. A painter is in a psych ward and she has not spoken for 6 years since her husband's murder.  A therapist sets out to help her.  And that is ALL I am saying.  READ it.

Finally, here is what Storm is reading........ well, he is in the other room right now, so  you'll have to wait for the title.  It's something about science.  Laughing (at myself).  I have to give Storm a lot of credit when he tries to explain to me what he is reading......especially when he just brings it up himself.   Over the past several months, I have encouraged Storm to share with me whatever he wants, whether he thinks I would be interested in it or not..... his work, his thoughts, what he is reading, what he thinks about my nekkid booty ........ anything!   The man keeps too much to himself and although I mostly want to respect that he is somewhat of an introvert, I really want to know what it going on in that amazing brain of his.  He continues to surprise me with what he loves to read about......we're so different in this way, but I find it very attractive, actually.  Woo! Woo!   Nothing like an intelligent man who doesn't claim to know more than the average person. (HeLies/He'sGifted/He'sBeenTested.)

Recently, he begins with something like this, "Did you know.....?"  and I can tell you right now that the answer to that is ALWAYS going to be a big fat NO from me because I don't know science and I don't care about it either.  Unless he wants to tell me about it, like I said.   Oh here he is now.  Let me ask him the name of his book.   Oh, wow.  Laughing.  How did I forget this?   It's called, Your Inner Fish by Neil Shubin.

He says and I quote, "It's about the finding of the fossil that is a link between fish and land animals.  It's basically a fish with hands."  Lord help me.   All I want to know is what kind of fish is it, what did whoever catch it on (what kind of bait), and if it tastes good when ya eat it!?!

Me, "So did they find this fossil? And where was it?"
Spoiler..... Storm, "Yes, they found it.  Way up North on Ellesmere Island in Canada."
 I repeat to him just now what I think he told me about this book the other day.  "So researchers have found in the embryo of a certain kind of salamander, an "organizer" part of it that if they remove some of this tissue and put it elsewhere within the embryo, then 2 bodies are created instead of one."   And then, "Scientists took a piece of the "organizer" from a chicken embryo and put it on a salamander embryo, then that embryo produces 2 salamanders, meaning twins. "  Why, we care, I do not know, but it is kind of interesting.

I ask Storm why we care about this.  He says, "Scientists are studying embryos to understand how bodies are built." 
Me, "So where are my fins?" 
He dumbs it down for me, "The idea is that life started in the water and as it evolved, it came on land."   Me trying to make his life difficult for bringing me into this discussion even though I asked for it, "So what does this say about the snake Satan in Genesis?"    Oh gosh, he is showing me diagrams now that remind me of my confusion since middle school science class -- evolution.  Basically, we came from one of those ugly fish I posted back in this post  - Fishing for a Spanking?   And with that,  I quit.  Except to say that I can basically sum up my life since turning 50 as the cognitive dissonance resulting from a lifetime of knowing about Genesis and recently learning just enough about evolution to make a person go crazy trying to connect the two.

What are you reading because I know you're not fishing?!!!

Sunday, November 17, 2019

The Meeting

October 31st .....

The trick-or-treaters will be here soon, and I could care less.  It is SNOWING here and it's blowing sideways.  But, that candy we bought certainly isn't going to eat itself and the more it sits around, the greater the chance it's going to end up in Storm's gut or my butt.  Not UP my butt -- but the carbs and sugar turned to fat will end up there!  If you're looking for anything "up the butt," I can tell you right now you're on the wrong blog!  HA!

Oh, now I am thinking of kinky nekkid things because I just said the word "butt" in the same sentence as  "Storm" and now all we need is the paddle and my story is all set to go!  Woo! Hoo!

Okay, so it's been about 2 weeks since we have had any of the above time together at all due to..... you know what?  Who cares why?!   It happens because of life getting in the way!

We had a short window of time together yesterday, and we spent it in the bedroom with Storm reacquainting  his paddle and my butt.  And, no, it did not say, "Fancy meeting you here!"  Although it was.  I wasn't in trouble......I've actually been very sweet lately, but we live a spanking life, so over the bed I go.  This wasn't planned, we just went with it, and we did not have time to be sexy afterwards.  Toward the end of this long meeting of the minds (my mind is apparently connected to my ass). the alarm on Storm's cell phone went off.  He suspends the spanking to go turn it off and then he announces that we only have 5 minutes left before his work conference call.  I wasn't disappointed because this was kind of a long, thorough spanking and I was almost ready for it to be over anyway.  Almost.  Grin.  A short time later, Storm finished up the business at hand and would soon turn back to his work business. Just before he leaves the room, however, he looks over his shoulder and says, "If you want to come into my office while you're naked, bring the lube."  I don't know what chemical or hormone or whatever it was, but it shot a little shock straight to my girlie bits.  Yikes!  Was he saying what I thought he was saying?

Two minutes later, he is in his office getting his headset ready for that phone call, and I showed up.  He seemed a bit surprised, happy, and so very ready to deliver.  I spent the next 10 minutes in his lap. I was becoming very aroused and a little vocal ...... and then the phone rang.  We paused for a few moments, I stood up, and Storm joined in on the call........ and then muted his connection so they couldn't hear anything.  He then put me in his chair and knelt next to me where his hands could reach all of me.  I could hear voices through his headset, but couldn't make out any of the words, not that I was trying.  I clarified with him that this would not be a visual conference call and that I hoped the camera to his computer was not hacked!  He reassures me and continued with the job at hand once again.  That was the best conference call I have ever been a part of!

Wednesday, November 13, 2019

Love our Lurkers Day -- To My Imaginary Friends

To me, you are invisible, except that I see the evidence of someone having been here when there is a change in the number of blog hits.  Is it you?  Are you here?  I know you don't comment, but I just imagine that you read, nod, smile, laugh, perhaps raise an eyebrow here and there, and maybe you even get spanked yourself!

To me, you are the blank page that I look at as I begin to fill it with words that I want to share with you and I hope they have some kind of meaning to you.

No, I have never heard from you, but you hear my voice every time you read my writing.  You know my sense of humor, what a few of my passions are, and even things that irritate me because I have chosen to share parts of myself here with you.  You even know that sometimes I drop my drawers (for Storm.)  That's pretty personal, Bub!

Are you ever tempted to comment here or to say hello via a little email?   Or have you actually not shown up yet but will do so in a year or two and read this and maybe I will still be here, but maybe I won't.  Who knows that far in advance?  But, it sure would be a shame if we missed one another.

Sometimes I hope for that email.  Sometimes I am scared of it, too.  I've had a couple of things happen via email that spooked me and/or crossed my boundaries.  It happens, but everybody moves on.

So for reading here and supporting me from near or far, I thank you.  If you're a gal (I don't email with dudes), how about you let me get to know you as well as you know me?   I dare ya.   What if I email you and we don't hit it off, Windy -- what if we don't feel that friendship spark?   My response is, "Oh, Dear Reader, but what if we DO?   What if I'm scared, Windy?  It's okay, I remember being very scared too, but I've learned that we take it slow and build trust from there always keeping in mind each others' comfort zones, availability, and willingness to share.

In any case, please say hello here if you feel like it.  Thank you for reading!  Happy LOL Day!

P.S. And for those of you who I have emailed with either a little or a lot, please feel free to comment here and/or drop me a line.  Just don't drop your pants.  Unless you want to!  Then make sure you tell me about it!

Sunday, November 3, 2019

I Know that Look..........

I know that face....... I know that feeling........

What face?  What feeling? 

I know that quick thump in a woman's heart...........

What thump in your heart?  

Of course, like you all, I am familiar with the thumping of the heart and the expressions on the face of a woman in love.  But, what I didn't know before TTWD was the face of a woman whose husband spanks her nor did I have the feeling of the thumping of her heart when her husband gives her that secret look or says that secret  phrase that only the two of them know that means she's in trouble and she'll pay for it by bending over the bed with a paddle just as soon as the time is possible.  It's almost a look of relief on the wife's face because she knows her husband is being consistent, true to his word, and holding her accountable, oh, and dominant!  Her countenance would be one of disappointment if he didn't catch it, call her out on it, or notice it.  Instead it's a look of vulnerability combined with a little bit of humor and a slight sense of dread at realizing she's busted.  And inside, there is a little heat going on that will later be rivaled by the heat of her spanked ass!  And THEN,  all of that fuels that unmatched TTWD sexual fire which makes you feel like teenagers again except now that we all finally know how our equipment works, sometimes it malfunctions.  Dang it!  LOL  Either way, a very interesting and unique kind of intimacy burns brightly.  And now, I am finally done with this paragraph because I have run out of synonyms for the word "heat."  You're welcome.

Something happens in a domestic discipline marriage that most others in vanilla marriages do not notice in public. But the wife knows and the husband notices, if he is on high alert, which he almost always should be when one is married to a gal with a peppy personality much like the ones that are strewn about our beloved blog land.  I don't know how much of it is visible to the unsuspecting eye.  Perhaps Storm and I  don't have anything to show outwardly.  <<Shrug>> We still feel new to it because our TTWD has been caged out of necessity and because of shitty things that have happened here the prior X amount of years.  It isn't about the outside anyway as I think a domestic discipline relationship is mostly covert.

But, I do think both friends and strangers alike see Storm and I for what we truly are.  I'm sure they don't see Storm being dominant and me as submissive.  And you know what?  It's a very subtle thing anyway, especially in public or in front of other people. Our husbands don't go around trying to boss and control everything. Yuck.  Are they in charge with gentle care? Yes.  Do they expect their wives to be themselves and have fun, but to be respectful? Yes.  Do they occasionally hear us ask if we can spank them for once instead because we're in the mood to push it ?  Laughing! Yes, but they often glare and spank right away when we take that risk!

On our most recent vacation, I think our TTWD friends saw that we are genuinely in love, that we listen to one another, and that we are are often touching, holding hands, but not in an obnoxious way.  Just while we're walking hand in hand or some affectionate little touches while watching a movie.  Or Storm reaching back behind his seat in the chauffeur mobile to grab my leg and flirt with me. I'm sure they saw that Storm is a gentleman.  He opens doors for me at home and on vacation.   He takes care of me.  I think they felt our sincerity with each other and our sincerity with them -- you know, that one thing in addition to a sense of humor that Meredith looks for when she is recruiting a new good blogger........sincerity.  (Boy, was I an easy catch!) 

There is one minor exception and that is that I was not as sassy around them as I am at home because heck yes, I was trying to be careful in front of another TTWD couple!  Duh!  No big deal though because I need practice keeping my mouth shut with Storm sometimes anyway. HA!  I blew it a couple of times on accident, but Storm and I worked it out in private whispers during site seeing.   Anyway, we were their guests, they clearly had everything under control, we had no complaints and we were so swept up in their hospitality and the sense of easiness among all of us and our willingness to get to know each other better that mostly all I could mange to do was just try to soak it all in.  And I'm glad I did because I still think about some aspect of our trip and our friendship with them almost every day.  I stuffed my brain with stories, with little quotes, ideas, scenery, snapshots, the fresh air --- oh, gosh, that fresh air!!!  And when my brain was full, I stuffed even more in my pockets.  And, no I do not mean that I pilfered their silverware!  But, I do have a couple of interesting rocks from their beaches.

Also, I am sure they noticed how intently we listened to all that they had to tell us and show us.  Storm is a very good listener, enjoys a wide range of topics and does way less talking than he does listening and I believe that is part of what contributes to his wisdom.  I am a pretty good listener as well when I want to be and this time, I really wanted to be.

So when we were climbing back into the comfortable chauffeur mobile after a tasty snack, I heard Meredith ask, "Jack, are we okay?" and then I heard his gentle and matter of fact response, "We will be tonight,"  I saw the look on her face -- the questioning twinkle in her eye and slight catch in her voice that means, "Do you have me, Jack?  Did I push it just a bit too far? " With the hope, not that she's going to be in trouble, but she's not quite sure if she is or not, but she suspects she should be......."   And, yes, Jack has her right there in his care. 

If I didn't know about TTWD, all that of that would have went right over my head, but because we're friends, I knew what it meant.   And I was thinking, "Ah, Geeze."  This is my friend and I don't want her to be in trouble at all, ever, but that is not how TTWD works and we signed up for all that we have to pay for later over the side of the bed.  So I laughed a little bit, then she laughed and smacked me on the arm for laughing.  I'm laughing as I type this.........

So, yeah, I know that look, that face, and that thumping of the TTWD heart because I experience it myself, and if you could have seen my face right before Storm spanked me to a Sunday afternoon freshly toasted bottom, you'd have seen that look, too.


Thursday, October 31, 2019

The Challenge of Finding Domestic Discipline Friends

Are there those of us who read spanking blogs, who can read about relationships or just the spanking itself or the living of a ttwd life who haven't said anything to their spouse/partner yet?   Why do you wait?   Is it the fear of rejection ?  Is it better to live with the fantasy of maybe it all becoming possible one day rather than to run the risk of finding out that it cannot be a reality?

There seem to be so many spanking websites, blogs, Twitter accounts, etc. yet very few of them focus  on spanking for disciplined wives, and many of those links have gone the way of Error 404 -- you know, that message error that "indicates that the browser was able to communicate with a given server, but the server could not find what was requested?!"  Sounds like somebody got their order wrong in at the fast food drive-thru to me. Hmph!  Anyway, some people prefer Twitter, where they can read 180 characters and hit a heart button, and move onto the next account on their follow list.  That isn't relationship building.  I don't know what it is to be honest, but 180 characters at a time is a very slow way to get to know somebody!  Is it that some people just want to read something short and get a quick spike in dopamine?  I would say that people are just too busy to read blogs, but I think many people who use Twitter actually spend a lot of time on it.

Do you think that gals are still out there somewhere unreached or maybe already having little groups of their own, but most likely scared off by the kind of sites that are just "too much?"  I used to be one of them searching to see if there was anyone else out there like me but looking around with only one eye barely open for fear of what I would see.  I remember typing into my search engine things like, "Spanked wives, minus porn, articles only," etc. No thank you, harsh spanking pictures, naked-every-body-part-you-own in every position seemingly possible. Laughing.... I did not know to type in the word "blog!"  Ugh!

Just last week in my attempts at keeping my eye out for new dd sites, I clicked on a promising link, and it was indeed a dd blog that I had never  been to before, but suddenly, the wife was writing that she was put in diapers by her husband as punishment for who knows what!  I can't remember anything other than a healthy adult woman wearing diapers to bed.  I have never said this on my blog before, but what in the actual eff?  Yes, I knew this was out there somewhere, but I didn't think I'd come across it simply by looking for other mainstream ttwd wives.  GAH!

I also didn't realize that straight up Christian Domestic Discipline websites still exist.  I thought that had gone out with that infamous couple from a few years back who I did not know, but know of, and am not going to mention.   I don't care if others practice this way, but as a Christian myself, I just think Jesus could care less if my husband spanks me whether for discipline or fun as long as it's consensual and healthy for both of us.  And if a spanking was as painful as labor pains as was reported, my husband wouldn't have any front teeth when he woke up out of bed the next morning, and that would signal the end of many things, the least of which would be domestic discipline!  (My Storm is sweet and gentle, and knows how to apply just the right amount of ouchy when he spanks my butt.)

I am finding that sex blogs and sex websites make up the overwhelming majority of the internet because we all know that sex sells.  It is true that good sex writing appeals to many of us.  I think it is healthy to explain how the human body and sex work, to present ways to get through sexual difficulties, to express sexual humor, to give lots of ideas on how to spice things up in the bedroom, to help one another heal from sexual trauma, and write a sexy tale or nine, etc.  However, many blogs that have some content that interests me often seem to have the attitude that almost anything goes.  For that reason, I can't join in.  I've been tempted, but it makes me feel overexposed to things that I truly do not want to know. (*whispers*  Like diapers!)

I think even though what most writers and bloggers do and practice is consensual, in no way do I think "anything goes" is a healthy philosophy let alone a safe one.  That may not be true for you and I accept that, but I have to guard my own heart and mind.......and Storm's.  And just because of the simple fact that we have a spanking relationship does not mean that I want to invite all kinds of extremity into my home let alone my brain.  And anyone reading here who is happy and healthy living a vanilla life doesn't have to approve of my ttwd relationship with my husband either.

I always welcome advice and feedback in the comment section of my blog and I do my best to take it in the good spirit in which it is meant although I do think I have fumbled a time or two. I don't have all the answers and I don't like when anyone who claims to live a domestic discipline type relationship thinks they do. I don't like it when any blogger, no matter what genre their blog theme lands in, speaks to his/her readers as the ultimate authority on the topic.  Blah.  I do, however, appreciate it when their recipes are precise, not to mention very yummy!

Sunday, October 27, 2019

The Dog Days of ....... October?

Most weekdays,  a  90 pound dog drags me around the neighborhood  I take a 90 pound dog for a walk.  I've never owned a dog before and I am not the owner of this one either, so all of this is very new to me.  Interestingly, I am allergic to all dogs and cats and almost every animal with any kind of fur.  And I don't mean like a little sneezey and itchy kind of allergic. I mean like death is near kind of allergic. 

When I was a kid in the 70's, my mom took me to the big city for those allergy tests called scratch tests all over my back and all the animal ones were huge welts, especially the one for horse.  The doc said he'd never seen someone have such a strong reaction to it.  That would explain why the 2 times that I went horseback riding as a child that I ended up in the hospital exactly TWICE with a horrible asthma attack.  Combine that with being highly allergic to the hay on the hayride and in the barn -- it's a wonder I survived.

I say all this to say that I can't stay inside the neighbor's house with the dog for long, but I can take him for a walk and be just fine.  I also find it ironic that every time I enter the house and offer my hand to him to sniff, that he sneezes!  I ask him if he is allergic to me and tell him that I am allergic to him as well.  He likes to get in my face when I bend down for any reason and then I say, "Your breath stinks, dude."  And he looks at me like, "It's morning, lady, and your coffee breath doesn't smell the greatest either."  I'm sure he is right especially because his sense of smell is 10,000 times as strong as ours!

They say (whoever "they" are) that dogs can tell if someone is dying, so I have watched this canine fella closely to see if he suspiciously starts sniffing somewhere on my body and then I reflect on whether or not I have had that particular body part checked out recently. (Isn't it interesting how an anxious mind works?!  Who knew?!  I did!)  So far so good.  Although it doesn't count when he sniffs my butt because that is what dogs love to do.

Most days, we walk to the big park nearby, so many days in a row now it's like that book a Thousand Splendid Suns, except it is a Thousand Splendid Sniffs because of that whole 10,000 times thing.

I'm always on the lookout for weirdos.  There are many clean portable potties every quarter mile or so, and I had to go, but I suspected the dog would not want to go in with me and even if he did, there wouldn't be enough room.  So I held onto his leash and went in and took a whiz as fast as I could.  When I was done, the dog was just patiently waiting for me and I laughed thinking of the picture that could have gone viral had someone taken a snapshot of a dog standing just outside a portable potty, with his leash extended through the door-crack of the outhouse......... clearly with someone hanging on for dear life on the inside.  I'm fortunate he didn't try to start running because he is very strong and could have pulled me right out with my pants down.  Not cool, as Storm is the only person who is supposed to see me like that when he says, "Bend over!"

I carry a tiger claw with me for self defense. I look men in the eye like, "My dog will go straight for your balls if you even take one step in my direction......."   There has been suspicion by the dog owner herself and me that some shady deals are going down at the park even though we live in a nice town and the grounds are well kept.  There is one car  of which I could provide a detailed description including its occupant who parks in the same spot most days, for no apparent reason, wears a baseball cap  and keeps looking around like he/she is waiting for someone.  As long as he/she stays away from me, we're good.

I always text Storm exactly 3 times on each dog walk.  First, I tell him when we're at the park with this text, "Park."  Next, I tell him when we're on the main street heading home...... and finally when we make it back safely.  I do this because it is a very large park and I figure if I go absent that they will have a better idea the point at which I have gone missing.  Can you tell that Storm and I have been binge watching How to Get Away With Murder?!   Loooove Viola Davis!

The dog and I don't talk much to one another.  I figure he doesn't want to hear about politics because I suspect that his owner and I have different views on that subject and he might be offended on her behalf.  I don't tell him my problems either.  We just walk and I ask him questions about what he is smelling, tracking, tracing.  I mostly just tell him that he is a good boy and I speak to him in a happy voice.   Afterwards as we chill in his backyard together, I thank him for taking me on a walk and he looks me right n he eyes for approval and love ....... I only look for a second at a time in his eyes because some dogs don't like direct eye contact and I am not about to test that theory.  He can be the dominant one, not me.  I don't care about power dynamics when one of us is a dog and I'm not the one wearing a collar!

Monday, October 14, 2019

Jaws and Oral Sex

We're all familiar with those two deep and infamous notes that start out slowly and get faster and louder... Daaaa dum..... Daaa dum..... Daa dum......Da dum....Da dum!!   Then someone is eaten by Jaws and not in a good way!  Why this particular photo is of a shark who apparently has the lower jaw that resembles an erect albeit somewhat pointy and blue engorged penis, I have no idea!  Purple and angry, I get, but not blue.  Maybe he is holding his breath?

Speaking of things being "eaten," much throughout our ttwd journey, we have done that spanking-then -a-blow-job, spanking-then-a-blow-job-thing.  Especially in the beginning, Storm was learning to meet  my spanking needs, and I felt that I wanted him to enjoy it not just during, but afterwards.  I have read that there is a common pattern like that in new ttwd relationships, especially if the wife is really wanting her husband to get on board with this and to see that he will benefit from it, too.  If in no other way at first, at least sexually.  Then you can grow together........ or whatever.  There is no one way to get started, we each pave our own way, but it's just something Storm and I did naturally.

Often after I am spanked, Storm likes to stand on the side of the bed and play King of the Mountain and I, as his Pink Cheek Queen, play huff and puff on his flute to a tune much to his liking.  Toot! Toot!  I have heard of women humming while giving a blow job before, but I've never tried it.  If I ever do, I'm certainly not going to  hum the theme song from Jaws.  That might give Storm the wrong impression of my intentions! Yikes! 

I learned a long time ago when I was pregnant that I had TMJ (jaw pain) and that was common when hormones change.   Many years later, my hormones are changing for different reasons and so the TMJ, not to be confused with TMI, which this post might be for some people, so feel free to move on, has reared it's ugly head again. 

As a result, it has been challenging to give blow jobs sometimes, and Storm would never want me to hurt while doing that, so we have been  careful and sometimes resort to other options for Storm's pleasure.   Well,  this particular time, I tried again.  I felt that I needed to open my mouth wider than it was, but I couldn't do it, so I pulled on the bottom of my own chin and it popped a little as it sometimes does, I went back to the work at hand/mouth and........  OWWWWWWWWWW!!!     I had to pop it back in and that was painful.  That was about 3 weeks ago and I haven't given him a blow job since.  I can't!  Laughing.  My jaw is all jacked up and it even hurts to chew sometimes!  (It's improving, so please hold off on the medical advice.  Ugh!)

So it looks like I'm down to one hole and 2 flippers for the time being like this gal!   I will just have to give Storm's junk some tugs and kisses for now!

 I hope that is enough to get the job done for Storm. I'm not holding my breath, but I am keeping my mouth closed!!!!!!

Tuesday, October 8, 2019

Spanked by Surprise

Storm and I have a method we follow as we both set up for a spanking.  I hesitate to call it a ritual because that can mean something different than what I mean, but I guess technically, that is what it is.

Once I am naked and bent over the bed, he ALWAYS lays the paddle flat against both cheeks to let me know he is about to begin.  So I am lying there, trying to get my mind in the right place like  the good little submissive wife that I am (HA!), and WHAM!!  I shot straight up while exclaiming, "OUCH!!  You SCARED me!"  I continued to talk fast, "You have never just started spanking without a signal first........."  It  turns out we had never talked about it.  It was just something he made a habit of and that I came to expect, never even bringing it up.  Until NOW!   I'm laughing a little, "Gosh, seriously, Honey?  This spanking is supposed to be to help me with my anxiety and you just started it off by scaring me half to death !!!! "

Well, it turns out that while he did briefly apologize accompanied by a chuckle, that he wasn't worried at all about any long lasting effects and I knew this by the intensity of the spanking. Twenty-four hours later, as I sit here typing this, I still feel it.

Has a spanking ever caught you by surprise?  If not, what has spooked you recently?

Sunday, October 6, 2019

Needs, Likes, and Helps..........

I thought Storm and I were doing well living the life of TTWD, and I think we were, but we had a huge fight and it was so intense that he put the breaks on all things dominant and I had no choice but to back off and watch it happen.

Basically, what it boils down to for me is that I absolutely refuse to be submissive if he's not going to be dominant.  I just can't do it.  I feel that the submission makes me softer, but I don't want it to make him softer, too.  I quickly recognize situations where I desperately want him to lead, step in, but he doesn't always see them without me pointing them out first.  I told him that it was embarrassing enough the very first time  I suggested  domestic discipline to him, and did he have any idea how embarrassing it is for me to have to keep telling him?  There was truth in what I said to him, but I was too harsh......... and he felt that he failed us in some ways, and he just shut down and told me he was doing so.  Yikes!

We did some talking the next day, but not a lot because he wasn't feeling well. Storm is quiet often, but this was different.  We both just had that sick feeling that lasts a couple days after a big emotional blowout.  I felt horrible that I made him feel so bad about himself.

I took the time to think about our version of TTWD, and for the first time in a very long time, I seriously thought of how our life would be without it.  And, I thought of other gals in blog land who had TTWD relationships at one point, or sort of had it, or have never had it even though you asked your husbands for it........... and I can see why you finally gave up and maybe even possibly why husbands quit, too.  I'm not encouraging anyone to give up, I'm just saying that I got a real taste of why some of you have.

I don't need him to be more understanding, more caring, etc......... he already is those things in abundance.  Traditionally in marriage, that is what both partners are if it's a healthy relationship.  Storm is not demanding or self-centered.  He's so selfless that after 30 years of marriage, I told him that I don't even know what his needs are other than sex and it isn't for lack of me asking.  But, I cannot communicate with him any more than I already am...... I'm just out of ideas of how to ask him.

I know his standard answer is his philosophy of JOY......... Jesus, Others, You.   And, NO, we do NOT practice Christian domestic discipline.  We don't care if you do, but we just as a couple think that Jesus could care less whether my husband spanks me or not as long as its consensual.  Anyway, JOY means putting oneself last, which is what Storm tries to do and it is frustrating the heck out of me.  I can express to him what my needs are.........why can't he tell me what his are? 

Well, we finally found the right words.  He is uncomfortable with the word "need"......... so I said, tell me instead what you LIKE........ You have to have some expectations of me......otherwise why am I here if you don't truly care what I do and you're just happy with whatever it is that I happen to offer?  Blah!    Turns out there are actually lots of things that he likes.  Who knew?  Not me!   The other thing that I asked him is what are the things I do or can do that HELP him in some way.  Finally, those things he could tell me.  I am so relieved!

 We had, for lack of a better term, a very vanilla week.  I've been really into cooking this summer and fall and Storm loves it.  I didn't know how to make him feel better emotionally, so I just cooked him some good food, mostly healthy except for the caramel apple cinnamon rolls. 😁 We went an entire week with no dominance and I would say no submission, but I can't because what happened is that I was instinctively very attentive to him. But, I was only able to do this because   he finally was able to express to me what some of his LIKES (which are needs that he doesn't want to call needs)  are.   You may think that it is silly that he doesn't want to call it a need, but his reason is that he didn't want ME to feel like a failure if he told me what his needs were and then I couldn't meet them sometimes and that would make me feel bad about myself.

I needed him in other ways this week...... I just needed him to be strong for me regarding something I have been very worried about.  He gave me lots of reassurance and we did hug a lot. Then a funny thing happened --  I realized he wasn't being actively dominant, but I sure as heck was being submissive anyway.  What?!!!!!   This was eye opening.  For me, the cooking and taking care of the house are submissive acts.  I know it doesn't work that way in all households and I think that is completely fine and normal however couples choose to balance things around the house.  But, for me personally, the cooking especially feels domestic and it makes me feel like I am taking care of Storm. I was also coming to him for reassurance with my worries and he was leading and guiding me right through this rough spot.

It makes me feel better and somehow safer to know that Storm and I can make our marriage work well without TTWD.  -- that we're still very much in love, that I cling to him in times of uncertainty while he's right here strong and steady.  Thankfully though, Storm told me during our reconnect that he thinks our marriage is at its best when he is more dominant and I am more submissive.  So we will continue to work hard at sharing our needs, likes, and helps with one another.

Sunday, September 22, 2019

What's your lullaby?

The time of day or night for sex varies throughout a marriage.  Initially, we go through that honeymoon phase where it happens whenever and who cares as long as it's happening a lot!   As a young married couple, Storm and I often made love on Sunday afternoons right after morning church, but before night church!  What a leisurely time slot for some intimacy and then a nap, although some might argue that during any church service whatsoever is a great time to take a nap especially if there is a guest speaker.  It is not however, the perfect time to have sex.  Unless you know for sure that you have complete privacy in the balcony and if you are in no way afraid that a bolt of lightening will come out of the sky, down through the church roof, and up your---------, which is all that any of us would deserve if we did the nasty in church!   I doubt that our Sunday afternoon delight at home in our little love shack apartment was unique to us and that many a baby of church goers was conceived on Sunday afternoons!

We've never been an early morning sex couple........ he was too busy getting ready for a long commute to the big city every weekday morning, and I was either getting ready for work myself or on childcare duty or sleeping late if the baby did!

Some of us have worked different shifts than our spouses and had to live with times where quickies just barely held us over.  Then one of us goes off to work and the other off to bed!  A little later in life, Storm and I, like many couples with children, often made love just before falling asleep at night and that worked out for us for many years.  However, enter the spanking kink into our lives and we required total privacy or a sound proof room! 

However, changes in people's schedules here in our home has given us more privacy (THANK YOU GOD IN HEAVEN!)  and it has changed my body clock a little bit, so this most recent Saturday, Storm and I went at it in the morning for the first time in forever.

As usual, I was feeling stressed, and Storm decided to work me over a bit since we won't have total privacy again for a few days.  My body was tired, but Storm bent me over the bed anyway and started spanking and talking......... and his timing and rhythm was perfect.  At first, the paddle has quite the sting, but as he continues, I guess my butt warms up a bit and then it's less shocking. This eventually escalated into a very sexy time.

I was quite worn out after that kind of spanking, sex, and Storms' sexy voice, words, and actions.  I felt like a fat baby with droopy eyelids after a warm bottle of milk.  I wasn't drooling or wearing a bib, but other things were definitely wet.  (And I do NOT mean a diaper and if that is your thing, then I guarantee you that you'e on the wrong blog and please use the nearest exit.)  I decided that my husband had in effect, half lulled me to sleep with rhythmic spanking, sex and orgasm....... and the perfect thing to do was stay in that bed as naked as the day I was born and just take a nice long nap.

Did you know that babies develop a sense of rhythm in the womb when the mother sings to him/her?  Research shows that the lullaby encourages nipple suction in infants and that premature babies benefit from the rhythm of their mothers' singing voice.  I think most of us know that kind of thing, but did you know that when we sing to our babies whether they're in the womb or we're holding them in our arms that the singing is also therapeutic for the mother?  This I did not know.  Yes, I knew it develops bonding,  and I sang sometimes just to get the kid to sleep already, but the singing was also healthy for me?  Interesting.

In TTWD,  a lovely kind of spanking just before bed can put the wife on a fast track to sleep....... is this our from of lullaby?  Is the rhythm of a slightly more than tender slap-slap-slap soothing to us?   Or is it your guy's gentle voice guiding you into the night?

What's your lullaby?

Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Mindfulness Spanking

Recently and not to my surprise at all, I was told by my husband that we would soon be meeting in the bedroom for a spanking.  While I was waiting for him to finish up something he was working on, I decided to flip the television channel away from 60 Minutes  because it was discussing something upsetting:  my anxiety has peaked again recently and I am  trying to calm down, not freaking ADD to it.  And by the way, I have an  actual anxiety disorder, so when it acts up, I'm not exaggerating the havoc that it plays with my everyday life.  I don't care that I am sharing that with you here as I have before. It's part of many people's lives, and we're not  to be made to feel "less than" because of it.  Anyway, holding the remote control, fortunately my fingers landed on the PBS station and this gentlemen with a calm demeanor and relaxing voice was speaking on mindfulness.  My brain immediately went Ahhhhhh. Speak to me, kind man.  By now, we've all heard of mindfulness and most of us have probably practiced some form of it.  While I won't get into the specifics here, as I listened to the man and practiced with him what he was instructing, I relaxed a bit.

I will say that if I understand it correctly, one major benefit that he says mindfulness does for the brain is that it forms more connections in your brain and because the brain can change itself (neuro- plasticity),  practicing mindfulness helps improve concentration, clarity of thought,  and even the ability to better multi-task.  I practiced being aware of my body in the moment with him, my breathing, and even focused on noticing the different things in my living room that were a certain color, just acknowledging them and enjoying it.   And because ttwd is never far from my mind, it hit me........ are certain kinds of spankings that our guys give us actually a form of mindfulness?  I was about to be provided with the perfect way to find out.

Storm soon found himself ready for me, paddle in hand, at the side of the bed.  I undressed completely and bent over as he expects me to do. I knew that I was not in any trouble at all and that this would be a spanking that Storm would talk me through.  With his soothing voice just like the presenter on PBS but more intimate (and sexy).  Ahhh, speak to me, my kind man.  I  purposely thought of the feeling of my face pressing into the cool sheets and got distracted by the thought that I needed to change them soon.  But, that's okay because when you're practicing mindfulness, it is natural for your mind to wander many times.  You just bring it back to focus as soon as you notice it doing that.  Kind of like years ago after an exhausting day at work and an even rougher evening getting the children to bed, and now you're finally in your own bed and your husband decides he wants to  treat you to a little oral sex........... You notice things like what's on the top his head, the ceiling needs to be repainted, there are cobwebs in the corners, and what should you make for dinner tomorrow night?  Then I'd realize I'm all distracted and so I get back to just thinking and feeling tongue, clit, tongue, clit.......... there, right back on track again and I know Storm's neck appreciates that I stopped wasting a bit of his time.

"I love when you bend over and take your spanking," is one of the very sexy things Storm says to me, and it always turns me on, but this time I  took it as praise, that I was pleasing him, and that he was assuring me that I was doing as he wishes.  He mentions the special cooking that I have been doing this summer, how much he loves it, that he appreciates all the time I take to prepare it for him, and that it makes him feel that I am taking care of him.  This made me feel loved and appreciated to hear something that I am doing right in a month (or years) full of realizing that somehow, despite my efforts to communicate with sincerity, love, and an open heart,  my pleas for my feelings and convictions to be heard by other loved ones go unanswered.  Talk about anxiety.  GEEZE!  But, step by step, Storm attentively helps me put myself back together.

He praises me for reaching out to a friend that is dear to both of us, for asking for her advice as she has been around the block more than once, as well as around the country and around the world.  Last year when  he mentioned her name during a spanking, I freaked out......... this time, he was right and as grateful to the friend as I was and I did not give one whit that he had just mentioned her name again.  And, heck yes, I knew in that moment that I would be blogging this little side note!  I just smiled to myself and kept my naked ass up in the air anyway!  Laughing!   What can I say? I'm dedicated to the job, I mean Storm.

Storm unaware of my silly thoughts and truly dedicated to the job at hand continues to spank, speak, and soothe.  I soon get back to concentrating on offering myself up to him and truly focusing in on his voice and the spanks and the feeling of him caressing my bare back.  Mindfulness.  I'm doing it!  He goes on to tell me that he wants me to take care of myself, to put myself and my feelings first in specific situations that I cannot share here.  I don't say very much back to him.  When he first started this lasagna style spanking thing, because it made him more vocal, I naturally joined in and made it a conversation.  I have known for a while now that I don't think I should be doing that even though he has not asked me to shut up.  But for the past several times of a longer, more therapeutic type spanking, I only answer his questions when I know he wants one.  I do wonder if he has noticed me being much more quiet.  It makes me feel like I am actively more submissive, which is what we both want.

Soon he asks me to stand up and that means we're taking a short break.  It is time for us to hold one another as we stand at the side of the bed.  I put my face in my favorite spot where his neck meets his shoulder and inhale his unique scent.  Mindfulness.  I am naked.  He is not.  It is a sweet moment and then he asks me if I have anything to say or not.   But, because I am not quite clinging to him along with other body cues he is looking for, we both know the spanking is not quite over yet.  I need more time.  So, he continues to spank for a short bit until he sees with my body language that he has brought me to the place where I needed to be.  Then it is over, I stand up again, and hold onto him like plastic cling-wrap on a save-for-later, mouthwatering, buttery chocolate chip cookie. I feel him, smell him, hear him, and I need him.  Mmmmm....Mindfulness.

Monday, September 9, 2019

Topping from the Bottom.... Let me tell you what I need

Okay, we're all familiar by now with the phrase "topping from the bottom," and while I  haven't seen evidence myself in blog land where someone has actually written that they think one of us gals is still in too much control in their marriage, I am sure that has been someone's opinion at some point.  Rather what I see more often is we girls reflecting inward, criticizing ourselves for topping from the bottom, and then worrying that others would think that's what we're doing.  Personally, I drive myself nuts with this one.

Over the years in our marriage, I discovered that I like slow sex after a huge argument, but I have always preferred more aggressive type love making on his part, not mine.  Sure, we have experimented with me being on top, but that feels like I am in control so I do not prefer that.  However, I can see if the man wants the woman on top and then bosses her around or whatever while she's up there............ laughing.

I fully believe that I have to be honest with Storm when I feel something we're doing just isn't working for me.   Why should I be silent?  What does that gain us?  I'm sorry, but if the spanking technique or the reasoning technique didn't work, then it didn't work.  There are 2 main things right now that I need from Storm in order to make all of this work psychologically for me and therefore, helps put/keep me in a submissive mindset:  Decisiveness and time.

Look, we have a happy, satisfying marriage without ttwd.  We just do and I cannot claim that it has saved our marriage or whatever.  We have not made it to the point in our lives where we have reached a brother and sister phase, a friends only zone, or nagging and yipping back and forth type relationship, and I hope we never do because, yuck.  However, domestic discipline really adds a sexual undercurrent and a closeness between us, and when it all goes smoothly, it is very fulfilling for both of us and it enhances our marriage.  I absolutely crave and love when he is decisive as he exercises his dominance over me, and I love the way my mind and body respond to him ....... and he has told me he loves when I am his submissive wife in the bedroom and outside of it, too.  He's beginning to see more often how an authoritative response such as, "Enough," or "Behave,"  almost immediately softens me.  And that spanking on the golf course last week....... that was probably the most obvious effect to date...... it truly stopped me in my tracks, made me immediately reflective on my attitude, and calmed me.  It wasn't that the spanking was hard or long because, um, not really possible in that situation.  But, it was the emotional component of it, his taking charge, taking a short time to pull me aside, spank me, and tell me that my behavior was not acceptable.

There have been MANY times that Storm and I have had to settle for short spankings due to lack of privacy and while it was important to both of us to at least be able to do that often, it is just what barely holds me over and keeps me from losing my mind until we have a longer period of privacy.  Yes, the shock of a short spanking can sometimes help me switch gears, is a quick connection or check in, or it might just be a reminder to behave today.   But, when I am struggling with my emotions, my anxiety, my hormones, my relationship with Storm, or my relationship with others,  I need a longer spanking.

 That doesn't mean that I want a ton of smacks right in a row that echoes like someone accidentally set off a brick of firecrackers.......  that's intense, but too quick for me.  My mind needs the time to process that Storm is standing at the side of the bed with the paddle, that I know he expects me to get completely naked and bend over the bed.  I need to hear the timbre in his voice as he lays he paddle against my rear end that signals it's about to begin.  I need his words as to why he is spanking me even if I already know the reasons.  I need the spanking for a bit, then the pausing, soft lecturing and instruction, his soothing hand on my back, neck, and in my hair, and then more spanking.  Finally, I feel my body sink into accepting what is happening.  I have already given my permission when we agreed to this long ago, but in the moment, I need the time he puts into a longer session to ease my mind, stop the rat race that is going on in there, to break me, and then to set me free with my demonstration of submission.  Then I am ready to be his submissive wife and the evidence of that is my natural extension and presentation of my now even more upturned bottom.  And he KNOWS this, recognizes the signs for what they are and then he has me completely pliant under his dominant hands, right where he wants me.

In order to get to the place of the paragraph above, I have to communicate with him over and over.  He doesn't just magically know what to do without us having many many conversations, ones that are often repetitive....... but, so worth it once he gets the hang of it and then I can follow and submit.   I was recently telling Storm some of this and he reached his hand out to me, palm up which means, let's go, it's spanking time.  And although I put my hand in his in submission, because I felt that I kind of said I needed to be spanked and I felt that I had put the thought in his mind, I told him that I didn't want to get spanked because I felt that I was topping him from the bottom.   Him, "I don't care what you think it is. Let's go."   Laughing.  Okay, then.  Decisiveness.  Yes!  And off we went...........

What is something that you feel you need in your marriage no matter what the status of ttwd in your home?  Or what was a need that you had in the past and how did you communicate it?

Thursday, September 5, 2019

Why the Lion and the Witch were in the Wardrobe

My apologies to C.S. Lewis for spinning his book title for my own amusement.  As far as witches go, I'm not sure there was ever a meaner one than his White Witch, and I do believe Aslan is the most wonderful  Lion ever to be written about.  The wardrobe was furry and fascinating, but much different than the one Storm and I were in during a recent spanking.

The clothes and coats hanging on both sides of our  rectangular bedroom closet leave just enough room in the middle for two people to walk in single file and take several steps forward until faced with a white wall. There is no snowy white winter found deep within its depths.  There was, however, a dominant male lion, a chair, and a certain witchy gal bent over the sitting lion's lap.

Was this role play?  Nope.  Were we trying to be quiet?  Not this time!  Is there something kinky in there?  Does a paddle count?  Why be in there if you have the whole house to yourselves?  Why retreat to the closet where the sound is muffled by all the clothes, where it might be a bit over warm, and uncomfortable?  Because that exact spot with the exact chair, lion, and little witch where it all began for us.  This is where that very first spanking kicked off our earliest foray into the world of domestic discipline.  This is often the place where my mind retreats while Storm and I are being kinky and intimate.  Those first time butterfly feelings of Oh my gosh, are we really doing this?  My husband is spanking me right now and I'm submitting to him...... and the sting....... although it isn't about the pain, it's about the meaning behind it all.

 We thought with our newfound times of privacy here in our home that we would sort of start this new phase of our lives in the same way Storm started spanking me for discipline and I submitted to it for...... well, to learn to feel more feminine, to express my vulnerability,  and because it's hot.

And hot it was...... a mist of sweat broke out on my naked back.  This spanking hurt.  Although we can't recreate those first few magical moments of me discovering dd online, sharing it with Storm within a day, and getting established in our new roles as dominant husband and submissive wife, we wanted to reestablish with one another that powerful undercurrent of emotional and sexual electricity that leaves me shaky, clinging to him afterwards, with a toasty spanked bottom, that stirring embrace with his erection pressing into my stomach........... yeah that.......... that's why we were in the closet.

Where was your first spanking spot?  Does it hold powerful memories?  Please do tell us.

Thursday, August 29, 2019

Sir Spanks A Lot

Due to some happy changes in our home, my husband and I finally have some consistent alone time and it has made a world of difference in the way we live out our version of ttwd.  Basically, I'm getting spanked A LOT!

Example 1)  Storm and I went golfing last weekend in the early evening and I wasn't in the best mood. About an hour later (golf takes about 4 hours to play 18 holes), all of a sudden he pulled the golf cart off into a secluded area and I asked him what in the world was he doing because neither of us had just hit our balls over there!!??  He walked quickly around to my side of the golf cart and gently guided me out. It then hit me what is going to happen and I said, "Oh, no, Honey!!"  Yep, spanked in the treeline at the golf course. Nobody saw or heard because of the twilight hour, but still !

I am NOT used to this spanking right on the spot kind of thing because of no privacy........ well, things are a-changing!!!!!!!  Hilariously, I parred the next 2 holes and Storm said I just needed him to "warm me up."

Storm did check in with me after he spanked me, which was not hard to do because I am obviously sitting right there next to him 2 feet from his face. He asked if I was okay with what happened....... I guess I got quiet afterwards as I was thinking about it........... I told him of course I was okay, I'm sorry, and I got the message.

Example 2)  Earlier in the day, he found me in the closet. I was going on about something ...... and on and on. After a few minutes of that, he just firmly yet gently said, "Enough."  I was stunned silent!  He was hugging me and I was hugging him, then he said, "I heard you, your feelings are important to me, but move on ......."  Zoiks!  Looks like this is the way things will be going on around here from now on.......... and I'm a grateful ttwd wife (with a pink butt).

Example 3)  You may or may not believe me when I tell you I was thoroughly spanked the following evening!  GEEZE! I wasn't in trouble though.  He just wanted some time together to talk me through some things (with the paddle! OUCH!) and he told me that he liked the way I responded to him after he spanked me at the golf course. Hmmm. Oh reeeeally?? Now, THAT got my attention even though he pretty much had it with my rear end bent over the bed already!  He said he noticed a difference in me, that I had seemed more settled and less frustrated for the rest of the round and evening and that he liked that.   Anyway, I found that very interesting that he really did notice the change in me. Heck, I noticed in myself, but I didn't know HE noticed.

Tonight's spanking as described in Example #3  with  lecture ((Lasagna Style Spanking), led to some kinky fun after it was all over. You know what that is like -- feeling all submissive and turned on with a hot bottom and your guy presenting his hard part, all proud............. Dominant HOH as his modus operandi, Storm deciding which of my two orifices he wants to take advantage of. (Not 3! That one is NOT open for business, which is part of MY modus operandi and thank God it's not something he bugs me about!  Or should I say buggers?  HA! )

 Now that we have more time alone together because of positive changes in our lives, Storm sure spanks a lot !!

Saturday, August 24, 2019

I'm not bad?

Yesterday, this was totally me when my husband just mentioned possible spanking.  He couldn't stop laughing.

If I am getting spanked a lot, and I AM, I guess that means I'm bad.  We certainly don't practice ttwd because he's naughty!  There are spells of time where I am not in trouble, am doing things around the house, accomplishing whatever, and having a better attitude, but then  comes that  quick daily spanking that he tries to work in and I'm grateful for it, mostly.  However, I feel a bit confused sometimes and I say, "Wait, a second. I wasn't even naughty (yet) today,"  or  "Am I in trouble?"
Him, "No."
 Me, "Well, that FELT like I was in trouble!"

Things I have said to Storm frequently over the past several months as he/we have upped the intensity of how we're living our version of ttwd:

"I'm naughty."
"I'm crabby."
"I'm bad."   I get his hearty agreement on the first two, but to my surprise, not on the last one.

"I hate almost everybody, Honey," I explain partly why I think I am bad because I am overwhelmed with the stupidity, the silence, and the hypocrisy that is running rampant in my country these days.

Storm gently reassures me, "So do I, but I'm happy!"

Laughing.......  Storm is so anti-social, but you may not know that if you met him.  He's quiet and you would notice that, but he's also funny, quick to jump in with a quip, and he's a good listener, but what many people never get to know about him is that he has some things of his own that he would like to share.  Some people are so full of themselves, they don't take the time to listen to other people's ideas, concepts, and experiences if they differ from one's own.   He doesn't often feel the need to be heard, to be right, or to be liked, thus he doesn't usually speak out unless someone flat out asks him his opinions or thoughts on whatever the matter at hand is.

We have left places before and I will say to Storm in the car, "Honey, you know a lot about that subject," or....."I know you have strong convictions/beliefs on that topic, why didn't you speak up?"  He just figures other people aren't interested and he mostly likely isn't going to convince anyone to change their  minds on whatever  the topic is simply by hearing him give his views.  While I understand and respect what he is saying, I feel that he has wonderful ideas and different ways of thinking about things in life that make me think on a deeper level.  Part of it is his delivery.....he's just nonthreatening and humble.  And the other part is his compassion and the fact that he doesn't feel threatened in the least if you disagree with him.  This is a big part of the reason as to why I was so grateful to our most recent vacation hosts back in June.   He really likes them, he was truly comfortable with them, and they treated him like his voice mattered.  I am forever grateful to both of them for this.

So, upon further discussion, he tells me that I am not bad. He reminds me that I am being spanked because I get too frustrated, to take the edges off of my emotions, and to reinforce our roles.  Yesterday, I was hit with a wave of frustration over some things which resulted in him saying we might need to spend some time in the bedroom that night which translates into someone is getting spanked!  But, because I knew I hadn't been disrespectful or spouty to him, and the fact that I was exhausted from 4 days of migraines in a row and not much sleeping the next 2 or 3, I made the Lucy face because I truly did not want to be spanked for any reason, and I think I sounded just like you'd imagine.  Storm laughed very hard at my reaction as he put his arms around me, and encouraged me to just take a nap on the couch for a while and rest.  I took his advice immediately.  I may be a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them!  An hour later, I did feel better and calmer and we did the whole Netflix and chill, but he mercifully decided not to spank me.

I guess I'm not so bad after all, but I am not totally convinced.

Monday, August 19, 2019

Are You a Little Teapot?

Never, ever Google a term and accidentally read the first definition that comes up because it will oftentimes be from that bizarre Urban Dictionary, and then you will never be able to look at an innocent inanimate object again in the same way you used to.    Case in point:  The word "teapot."  Don't go look it up.   Here, I will save you the trouble:


A sexual act where a woman assumes a "doggystyle" position while man squeezes his testes one by one into her anus. After insertion, the woman then flexes her P.C. muscles while the man masturbates to orgasm. The man will sometimes make a whisling sound just prior to or during ejaculation to simulate the sound of a teapot.

Good grief.  Laughing........ never in my wildest kinkiest whatever dreams did I even think that anybody could think of such a thing let alone do it.  My eyes are still burning.  Of course, I read it to Storm and he laughed heartily.   "It was the whistling that really got me!" he explains.

Okay...... back to the main part of my post which I haven't even gotten to yet because of the above distraction on my innocent search for some pictures of teapots.  I was looking them up because I was trying to describe the spanking position that Storm had me in yesterday.  At first, I tried to think in just words how to describe it, but I came to the conclusion that an innocent visual might help.  He was sitting in a chair with his legs spread and I was over one of his thighs.  My butt was pretty high in the air, for his viewing and spanking pleasure, and if I am being completely honest, and I am, for my submissive pleasure.  Here is the visual:

Do you see how that teapot spout is beautifully arched?  That is what I felt I looked like during this spanking.  (but add some full fat cream to the situation).  And now we have some laughter....... in that closet (I'll explain why we were in there in a future post) and in blog land, too.  

The other reason I thought of myself as a teapot is because he says I have been doing a lot of "spouting off."

“I’m a little teapot, short and stout
Here is my handle, here is my spout
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Just tip me over and pour me out”

And tip me over, he did!  Once the spanking and the lecturing began, I uttered what I can only describe as some kind of near sputtering.  Ppptthhh!  Fttttthhhh!  I don't know if it was the angle or if I was simply extra sensitive that day, but the man was just medium to light tapping me with the paddle on my bottom, but it hurt A LOT.  I am normally still during all of my spankings.  Well, guess who got up during the middle of it and said, "OUCH, HONEY!!??"  And, no, he didn't get mad...... he just waited for me to stop sputtering, said he heard me, but we're not finished, and helped me put myself back in place where I belonged.  Hmph! More spanking and more lecturing about spouting off.  I mostly held my tongue after that and I stayed in place.  When it was all over, I came up on my knees between his legs, humbled, my head on one of his thighs, and not quite certain what to make of the situation as he held me there naked and waited until I was emotionally ready to put my arms around his middle.  Sometimes he just holds me like that for a while and smooths my hair and then tells me sweet things.

After some time for me to ease into another gear, the spanking time led to time over-the-bed-time and in-the-bed-time.  Nobody was a whistling teapot, but things did get very steamy!

When you get yourself into trouble and before the spanking turns you into a sweet spoonful of sugar, what kind of kitchen gadget or appliance might you compare yourself to?  A sour-attitude lemon juicer?  Something else or a little spouting off teapot like me?