Wednesday, November 4, 2020

Hanging in the Balance

 I love my country, but I am disgusted with some of the less flattering adjectives one could use to describe it in 2020, and accurately so.  I imagine a lot of Americans are feeling this in this very moment as we go into the wee hours of election night.  Those that have headed to bed probably had the help of a little alcohol while the rest are tossing and turning and punching the pillow with every flip flop. I am sure a ton of people no matter how they voted are suffering some election exhaustion.  The people I follow and who follow me on my personal Twitter are frightened and stunned and surprised that our country has apparently taken us back to the 1950's.  But, I am not shocked and the anger is not new to me.  I have been experiencing this on a micro level for the past 4 years. I knew it was coming.  No matter how this election ends within the next few hours and few days and no matter the winner, America has a lot of maturing to do.  I wouldn't mind right now if Storm had some Canadian heritage and a job that was in high demand there.  However, they wouldn't let us cross their border (oh, the irony!) given our Covid corroded American bodies.  And, no, I am not ultimately giving up on America, but I am keeping to myself.   

A couple of years ago as I was going through a big change in my life (not THE change), I was questioning parts of my faith and some of the practices of it and I wrote about some of that here then but not in detail.  I was and still continue to educate myself .... surprisingly sometimes fiction speaks to me in the form of truth and experience resulting in me allowing myself some room to grow. The Poisonwood Bible was bitter sweet as was The Great Alone, A Woman is No Man, The StoryTeller's Secret, and Educated.  The common themes in those books were religions that were part if not all cult, children caught hanging in the balance trying to figure things out as adult women, often abused, silenced, dismissed, etc.  But somehow goodness prevails.  A friend who was trying to understand my struggles at the time said to me, "Windy, we are good people. There are good people in the world from all different walk of life....etc..." in response to my fear of reaching out into my own sort of great unknown, great alone.  I didn't say so, but I didn't believe her then and I don't believe her today either.  Maybe I would feel a bit differently today had our nation come together as one with demanding truth over lies, science as our guide, God as our common love not a divisive one and formed a solidarity of voting compassionate, empathetic candidates as the leaders of our country.  But, we didn't do that by far.  

Storm and I have not been intimate for a long time because, hey, 2020 is wonderful for the entire world right now and who cares about sex?  I mean, we care, but I'm one of those gals who has to concentrate during sex.  I cannot be thinking about politics or religion or health issues from home all across the world and want to just jump in the sack and have an automatic great time.  Storm can.  Laughing.  Anyway, as he and I like to say when we have unexpected middle of the night sex, "The Cat Burglar" visited me.  The following morning, I said to Storm, "The Cat Burglar was a little upside down, backwards and confused for a bit there last night."  And he chuckled and said that's because he needs more practice.  I told him the cat burglar must have thought he was at a drive in campaign rally with all the horns beeping because he kept trying this beep-beep-beep-beep-beep rhythm on my clitoris that was completely weird and not at all helpful to the cause!  I almost opened my eyes and looked around for Joe Biden's white teeth in the dark. Instead, I flipped over on my back and turned on a low light so the Cat Burglar could rummage around in my drawers a little easier. Beep! Beep!

I am finishing this up the day after Election Day because I went to  bed around 2 am and left Steve Kornacki to work his midnight math magic with the interactive election map.  Poor guy.  I didn't post what I had written last night because I had no idea if I was making any sense.  Turns out, I did okay......... so here it is, a bit about how I feel right now as we're all left hanging in the balance in uncertain times and really not understanding many of our fellow citizens.  I can only imagine what the USA looks like to our allies across the world.  Ugh. 

9 comments:

  1. Glad to see you here! We've always believed good will prevail and I think it will, eventually. It all just seems so messed up! I'm so glad you didn't really see Biden in your bed last night. We don't need to begin his presidency with a scandal!

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    1. Hey there, you big pain in the --- oh, I mean, hello, my dear friend! LOL No getting mad at me. I owed you and you know it! I laugh at myself sometimes because I forget how clever you are --- a presidential scandal here in my marriage bed..... Joe does NOT need that!! Plus, I'm no Stormy Daniels. Thanks for all the encouragement, girl. Love ya! Hugs, Windy

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  2. Can I say - totally off topic - how thrilled I was to see your comment on the journey - and then to be able to read you here tonite!! Doubly thrilled!! I have missed you.

    Now about your election....... most of the time I keep my opinions to myself - not my circus not my monkeys sort of thing.......... but last night's fiasco was just too much..... I can NOT believe how so many people voted for tRUMP....... it makes me wonder about the state of the world ya know?!

    Hopefully after much hand wringing and whining by your chief .. the mail in votes will prove the American people DO care about each other.

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    1. Hello, sweet MorningStar! Well, who doesn't like to hear that she has been missed, eh?! I miss hanging out with you in blog land, too! Thank you so much for the warm welcome back. You made me feel really good and you made me smile. Thank you. Okay, we have a president to get fairly and squarely into office here and we Americans appreciate our Canadian support friends very much! Hugs to you! Windy

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  3. Nice to see you back. When frequent posters disappear it always leaves us wondering and filling in the blanks. Sorry to hear that your poor cat burglar went in for precious jewels and ended up with costume jewelry. That had to be a difficult discovery for him after sunrise.

    As for how the rest of the world views your country- I can only comment based on conversations with friends from here and around the globe. I think it would be best if I censored it down to, pity. There are a whole bunch of negative comments that could be made but pity is the most positive of them.

    When Trump won 4 years ago, after the initial shock if we squinted we could maybe see how it happened , but knowing what everyone knows now,after four years with him, it is so disheartening that your election is so close. If Biden does pull this off we can let out a little sigh of relief, yet much like you I'm guessing, we will not quickly forget how many people voted for such a discussing human being. I don't care what party line one falls under ( easy for me to say because currently as far as rights and freedoms go here our parties don't vary greatly).
    I have heard here countless times that people hope the border stays closed regardless of Covid. Let's hope those feelings will change as we no doubt all have individuals we miss.

    Anyway I would say I'd pray for a good result but no doubt it my voice would be drown out by the Christian Right's voices. Lol

    Best of luck to you navigating this challenging time.

    Willie

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    1. Hi, Willie! Thank you. I understand the wondering when bloggers disappear. I thought you disappeared before I did. LOL

      What you write about our election here is the way many people are feeling, some for the first time as they realize the level of support for a very questionable character. And, no, it isn't about party vs. party at this point. Eek!

      Very clever with the costume jewelry comment. lol He had his hands on the real jewel, but maybe it was a slippery little sucker, I don't know. LOL Thanks for the comments and for the fun. I hope you are well. Hugs, Windy

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  4. Hi Windy, it's so great to see you post! I'm sorry I am late in commenting, your post never appeared in my blogroll for some reason. I saw a couple of comments from you on other blogs and thought I would check in.

    It is so sad to see how un-united the US has become, particularly over the last four years and what is occurring right now. Somewhat shocked at how close it is knowing what we know now after the laddt four years.

    Sending positive vibes!

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Hi, Roz! I hope you are doing well over there! Yes, it's pretty tense over here and lots of division. Yikes! Hopefully goodness, science, and common sense will prevail.

      My post wouldn't add to anyone's blog roll for a couple of hours and then it just suddenly appeared. Weird. I hope the next one works right!

      Good to see that you're still in blog land! Big hugs, Windy

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  5. So nice to read your update - and please know you are not alone with this election craziness. Honestly I thought it couldn't get crazier yet here we are. It is super creepy scary awful to me to watch the news. Oh! And I am a fan of Steve Kornacki too!

    And can I just add...that darn Cat Burglar.

    Be well and keep the faith!

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