Thursday, December 31, 2020

Being Bad

 I haven't been able to handle being bad for a while now, but I don't mean that I don't make mistakes or that I can't be my usual sassy self.  All the times where I thought I wanted Storm to notice that I was being naughty in some way and carry out a deserved spanking is just not so much a desire anymore for me.  I keep associating the spanking with not being good enough.  Ugh! I told him a few months ago that I'm at a time in my life when I don't want to feel bad about myself or know that anybody is upset with me over anything.  I try so hard to avoid that and make peace and it drives me insane when things go wrong.  We all know this  year has been a tough one for many people.  I just can't take any more badness in the world right now.  However, that doesn't take away our desire to work spanking in our lives.  I'm more comfortable now with making the spanking something other than me being in trouble and it works better because I don't have to get to that difficult to reach space in my head where I feel bad and deserve a spanking when I'm not sure I do.  

I want to be able to be myself.  I want to swear and I don't want Storm telling me that I can't or it's not ladylike, etc.  I don't have to stop swearing in order to be submissive or feminine or ....hang on for this one... intelligent.  He has never minded it as long as I don't swear AT him, but I don't do that.  I don't swear at anyone in real life except the unfortunate souls who find themselves on my television and they happen to be political idiots.  Do I hear $2,000?  Nope, only 600.  Hmph. 

I also like to smack Storm's rear end in a flirty or sassy way.  Why do I need to feel that that is wrong of me if he enjoys me flirting with him like that?  I have admired his butt since I was 16 years old.  And, NO, I do not mean any kind of serious or play spanking thing with him.  Neither of us wants that.  In this particular case, I let something that some other ttwd wife said to me make me feel like that wasn't submissive of me or dominant of Storm if he allowed it. I gotta resist the urge that while learning from others' relationships, I need to be careful not to make something my own that doesn't fit me and Storm.  

So where Storm and I are at in our relationship is that we're focused on team work and how we were in our sex life when this whole spanking thing started organically so many years ago.  For that reason, I think what we have found is probably the truest form of expressing ourselves sexually.  When I first starting blogging, I wrote about comparing where one falls on the kinky scale to ice cream flavors.   It ranged from plain vanilla ttwd to Rocky Road D/S.  We still find ourselves in the French Vanilla category, but, I fully realize this can and probably will change in the future, especially after having read Bonnie's latest post.  Lots of stuff to digest there that might make even Willie pause, but hopefully not get a headache like I do when the world wide web of submissive and dominance discussions and practices overwhelm me.  😁  And where is NJ to give me an analysis of this post and Bonnie's, too?  (Hello to NJ's Frank if you're reading this and tell your wife to get back to blog land.  Please? lol )  I do know where NJ is and how she is.  She's busy with chickens, growing muscular roosters, training a new puppy, and running Canada. And being at least a little bit bad   naughty like all of us D/S gals! 



41 comments:

  1. It's interesting to me your reaction to the spanking = bad girl........ I never got that.. and thought if I only got spanked when I was 'bad' then I wouldn't like spankings at all!! I stress over making mistakes or being 'bad'. Life is much more interesting and fun -- and certainly less stress inducing now......(she says rubbing her bottom after last night's spanking)

    Wishing you and yours a very happy New Year --- and a healthy one!

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    1. Hi, MS! Wait, really? You never think of being bad/naughty, having broken a rule as the reasons for being spanked? What in the world am I missing? Would love to hear more of your reasons and views on this! Hugs, Windy

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  2. Love seeing you here! I do understand what you're saying but I really can't articulate what I want/wanted. I never felt bad or that I'd been bad when I got a spanking, but often I wanted a reason sometimes. Without there ever being a reason it was just a total game. The game is great, no problem with that, it was just that mentally I always needed a little more.

    I'm glad you are finding the best way for it works you and Storm, because this is such an individual desire. Now keep smacking his butt. I think that's the best way to keep both your minds in the right place!

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    1. Thank you, PK! This is so interesting... your comments and MS's, too. From my memory, Cassie only gets spanked for getting into trouble, right? You and I both have an issue with having to have a reason for the spanking otherwise it doesn't work. And we don't want to make reasons up in our head. So what are they other than punishment/discipline? Simply submission? Looking forward to a discussion if you're up for it. Hugs, Windy

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    2. I would love ... LOVE... to have a discussion about reasons for spanking.... and reasons that make it work :)
      Do you or PK have any suggestions how we do it???

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    3. I'd love to discuss too ladies - maybe a three way email session? As for Cassie - which is my only action these days - that lovely lady is spanked for fun/ sexy often. But the real one usually come from hiding things from Tom or putting herself in danger in his view point. I'm not even sure of what I want anymore.

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    4. Yes, I am in! My first three way. HAHAHAHA Email, that is, and normally I don't like them because someone always ends up telling on someone else .....cracking up. Or two of us talk and the other one says, "keep me in the loop" without contributing. Laughing. Whateva! I am up totally up for spanky talk among friends!

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    5. Although I would guess that the most beneficial for everybody kind of conversation would be to have it on someone's blog (or multiple blogs) for all of us gals to participate both bloggers and readers alike. It seems like there are several who are interested according to the responses here. I wonder how that could work.....

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    6. Windy Pk - gimme a couple of days -- got some free time on my hands till Monday and trust me - as much as I like you ladies - and as much as I want to participate - I've got some kinky plans .....


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  3. I totally hear you! I fantasize about spanking so much but I don’t necessarily feel like I need to be bad to imagine I’m being spanked for being bad.... it’s complicated. Spanking fiction I LOVE the reasons and the non con... love it.
    I also smack my guy on the butt.... he doesn’t mind that at all. I’ve sometimes jokingly said how about I spank you.... now that he says a resounding, not gonna happen!
    And politically..... I also hear you!!:(

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    1. Thank you, Minelle, for hearing me twice! HA! So you can imagine being spanked for being bad even though you weren't bad... got it. I can't do that though. Makes me feel like it's not real. It is complicated, you're right. The idea of non con spanking is kinky to me, too, but I've already consented so...LOL... Love your guys "resounding no" to his being spanked. Storm says the same thing! Good to see you, Minelle! Hugs, Windy

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  4. I am glad you are finding what works for you and Storm. Wishing you both a happy new year :-)

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    1. Hi, Terps! I think it's a never ending and changing kind of process? lol Thank you and Happy New Year to you and yours as well! Hugs, Windy

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  5. Hi Windy, it's so great to see you post! I enjoyed reading this. It's interesting how ttwd evolves over time and how our thoughts, needs, desires change over time. There are many different types of spanking and reasons for spanking. Back in the day when we had an active dynamic spankings were for discipline, to reaffirm our roles or for play. Even though there was an element of discipline I can't say I equated spanking with being bad as such.

    I love our you and Storm communicate and work through issues together. Glad you have found what works for you. Wishing you all a Happy New Year. Here's hoping for a much brighter year ahead.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Hi, Roz! It is great to see you here, too! I think you have a unique perspective ... kind of like a birds eye view of ttwd type relationships because you're very aware of what is written in blog land, but then you're personally experienced with ttwd and so you bring the realness to it, too.

      It just fascinates me and surprises me so much that you gals are like "yeah, it is discipline, but it is not from being bad ...." I am still trying to wrap my head around it. I am going to ask Storm to read all these comments and see what he thinks. Maybe I'll post some of his thoughts.

      Storm and I do communicate a lot, but we get stuck on it, too, just so you know. Keeping things honest. Drives me NUTS when we're not on the same page, especially when I am positive we are only to find out we AINT! LOL Happy New Year to you and your guy, Roz! Hugs, Windy

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    2. Hmm...maybe I could take a stab at the, " its discipline but not from being bad" aspect again. Perhaps the perspective is that being bad for most is intentional and is malice laced? I do screw up (more often than I'd like to admit now than I did before at times) and rules get broken. Most times they are an emotional reaction- ie we are in a discussion that ends up south or I'm distracted. Very rarely is it a case of purposefully doing something. So perhaps people don't associate those type of actions as being 'bad' but more messing up? Semantics? Possibly, but when discussing emotions, words can matter.

      That's probably clear as mud now! lol

      Happy New Year!
      w

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    3. I do get hung up on words sometimes, and to be honest, I was wondering if my phrase of "being bad" means something different to me than it does others. Mostly, for me, it's getting irritated when I'm stressed. I don't say awful things or do things wrong intentionally either. Although I will admit that the times where we have fought because our ttwd was letting one of us (okay, ME) down....that was ugly, but it was because it was emotional and hurtful.

      Your explanation does help, actually. If you took my "being bad" the same as others may have, then that is why they don't associate it with being spanked. Thus, semantics is probably it.

      So if we use other words like "breaking a rule," "being too emotional," "feeling guilty".... I think some of those to me would mean "being bad."

      Maybe one day we'll figure it all out, eh? LOL Happy New Year to you, too, Willie!

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  6. Hmmm...so many interesting points you made, as well as all of the comments. I think for me, I don't think of a spanking as the result of being "bad" as much as a route to feeling better because I may have done something I wish I didn't. It's a way to relieve myself of feeling guilty. Once that happens, I am once again more open to being a loving and attentive wife and he is able to let go of whatever frustration he has with me. In truth, I don't get "bad girl" spankings very often. In general we have a pretty smooth relationship and we don't have a ton of rules. Bottom line - it is more about getting back on track (or staying on track) - than it is about being punished like a child. It's a more adult version, I'd say.

    Just my thoughts. It does not really change anything - a spanking is a spanking after all. But it is a different perspective that takes away the feeling of not being good enough and replaces it with the feeling of lightness in my heart.

    Here's to a happy 2021 to all and I thank you so much for continuing to share your thoughts. They make me think and examine our own ttwd world.

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    1. Hi, Deena! Reading your thoughts here makes me ponder if the way I feel has something to do with the message I think I am receiving from Storm during a spanking. Maybe I have some wires crossed. Hmm!

      I don't think I feel guilty very often...maybe I wish I did and that would add to the "reasons."

      Spanking is mostly about submission and connecting here, too. Not many rules. So, when you're "getting back on track" or when you're "staying on track", what is the emotional feeling you get during that kind of spanking. What are you thinking? Please only share if you want to here. I'm just trying to address each others' comments here and there is a ton of good stuff in everyone's comments.

      Happy 2021 to you guys, too. Thanks for your experienced and relative words and ideas here, Deena. Hugs, Windy

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    2. Good question! I'll think this through as I type...

      Mostly I feel bad when I'm snippy toward him and I really have no reason to be OR I feel hurt by something he says or does, but I refuse to talk about it and instead I shut him out. He's super patient and gives me a huge amount of room to be who I am. He always lets it be until I find my way out of my head and we talk it out. Pre ttwd days, this would go on for quite a while and it had a detrimental effect on our relationship. Now, I no longer hold on to the anger/hurt for long because I know I can safely let it go - have a conversation and then a spanking and it's behind us (lol, no pun intended). So my emotional feeling that I get is one of reconnecting and being understood and heard. I no longer feeling guilty about how I behaved and it feels so much better from the heavy feeling in my chest I was holding on to.

      The only "rules" we have (other than the obvious one of not being rude and disrespectful) has to do with my physical health. Left to my own devices, I am not good at taking care of myself as I am in a caretaker role 24/7 - especially with Covid - so he makes sure I am staying on track for myself. And mostly I do. So with that sort of spanking it is much more of a physical reminder to take care of myself and with that, the emotional feeling I have is one of love. My heart soars to know he cares about me and the stingy feel is a physical reminder - for a while - that I am indeed loved.

      And finally, I can work myself up until I am feeling stressed out and anxious. What has surprised me most about this relationship is that I am a pretty strong headed lady and I can dig in my heels, yet I feel relieved when my husband recognizes that a bit of attention is needed and he takes over. So I'd say it's also the submissive feeling of being taken care of that is the ultimate emotional feeling I get and I can literally breathe deeper.

      Wow. You really had me think that through and I hope it makes sense. I've so appreciated reading all the comments. This is such a great post in that it has me more sure that this is the type of relationship that I do not only want - but need. Be well and stay safe!

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    3. Deena,
      Thanks so much for coming back to this. It's really good!

      You said, "I know I can safely let it go - have a conversation and then a spanking and it's behind us " ...... What is the conversation like? I think I am asking how do you and your hubby decide the spanking is due? Is it predetermined by you both or does he make the decision as each situation pops up? I would have a hard time saying I think I need to be spanked. I could say it, but then it wouldn't feel as real ....if HE said, okay you need to be spanked now, that would work for me.

      I'm also fascinated that you feel loved after a spanking because it shows he cares for you. I get stuck on this. I know Storm loves me and that he does ttwd because he loves me, but a feel good kind of love is not on my mind when it comes to spanking.

      The way you explained how it works for you, anyone reading this can see it's working for you and your husband and you are indeed loved. You also say, "it's also the submissive feeling of being taken care of that is the ultimate emotional feeling ..." I get the submissive part, but can you explain what you mean by being taken care of?

      Again, you don't have to answer any of this stuff if you don't want to or if you're tired of it, etc. I may do a new post that highlights some of the comments here to generate more discussion among blog land. Thanks for much for sharing how your ttwd/dd works in your home. I'm so happy for you that it is working. Yay! Hugs, Windy

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    4. Deena, I relate to your comment so much I thought for a minute I'd written it! I hope to post some of my thoughts on this maybe tomorrow 1-6.

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    5. PK, thank you so much for replying. I have learned a great deal from your blog AND your books and it has definitely had a positive effect on our personal ttwd relationship.

      Windy, let's see if I can work this through as I type.

      Our conversation is about whatever the issue is. We talk it out so it is clear where things went off track and why, and also why it is a rule in the first place. After we talk, he alone decides if a spanking will or will not happen. Sometimes he really can see that he may have had a hand in the misunderstanding or could have done something different (though mostly I would say there is a spanking that happens because most of the time this is my own stuff going on). Our basic communication has improved greatly with this type of relationship! It is a huge bonus!

      For me, spanking definitely is about caring. This is something I have requested of him - twice actually - years ago we talked about it and he was horrified yet years later I suggested it again and he was much more open to it (and swears he does not ever remember me bringing it up before). Now he is totally on board because he sees results that are positive for ME. Otherwise he would never - in a zillion years - be a spanky man (other than for sheer fun). He is doing it because he wants me to be the best version of myself and so do I, and for whatever reason that I truly do not understand - it works for me. I am still slightly embarrassed to say that, but it is true.

      The feeling of "being taken care of" is part of the submissive feeling that I find embarrassing and confusing. I just do. I feel like he is protecting our marriage from the stupid stuff I occasionally do or say that has a negative effect on our relationship. It makes me feel like he loves me so much he will do whatever it takes to keep me with him for the rest of our living days.

      There aren't lots of "bad girl" spankings that go on around here. Mostly I am quite even tempered, and generally can talk before things get to a more extreme point. He is also good about warnings when necessary. Mostly we cruise along pretty well. But when things get crazy around here, sometimes I get a bit crazy too and he needs to step up. And for that I am grateful.

      I really learn so much from all the brave bloggers out there in blogland. It has taken us so long to get to where we are comfortable with our own version of ttwd and I'm so grateful to everyone for sharing.

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    6. 'member I said I was gonna go google this HOH stuff...... I was having problems seeing a difference between HOH and D/s......
      I had some problems finding HOH relationships.. LOL google kept giving me tax return information.. BUT when I entered BDSM HOH I got all sorts of information. I even made notes :)

      You mentioned taken in hand - and one of the articles I read referred to the 3 different HOH styles -- one of them was Taken in Hand -- in that relationship the HOH makes decisions that are in the best interest of the relationship....... and the HOH puts the submissive first - wanting her to be happy and contented and the best she can be......

      Sounds pretty much like what you described Storm does........ :) it's all starting to make some sense to this old lady now

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    7. Hi, Deena! Thank you for continuing to add your thoughts and experiences here. I am sorry I didn't see this one until today. Having a hard time keeping track in this thread now. LOL Thanks for explaining more for me and everyone else interested. So glad your guy takes such great care of you. Sounds like it's working wonderfully for you both. Yay! Hugs, Windy

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  7. I suppose I HAVE to comment seeing how you called me out in your post. LOL. Now let's see if I can make your head spin again.

    I read Bonnie's post and while I can appreciate the progression of her mindset, it actually didn't give me much pause. It didn't because several years ago I had an 'enlightenment' period concerning my perception of self and submission/ttwd, and haven't currently left the thoughts and feelings of that time. They have waivered at times, but haven't left.

    For me punishment spankings, as odd as this is going to sound, rarely have anything to do with 'being' bad, through my eyes. I understand that for many, breaking rules or expectation have a great deal of guilt surrounding them, and they CAN for me as well if they are personal ( I am rude to Barney etc.) But for the most part me being punished has more to do with acceptance than accountability. Barney punishing me is an indication that he will not accept me for being anyone than who we know I am. This means that he accepts me as a submissive and when I choose poorly his non acceptance of that is actually acceptance of me.

    When we first started doing ttwd back in 2012, B rarely punished me. He did however spank often as a reconnection, or some would say role affirmation. He often did so when he noticed I was getting an 'edge' to me. Did I break rules back then? On occasion but his R/a sessions kept us both in our needed mindsets. Punishments were never a deterrent in our house. They were and still are two things 1) a sign that things have started to go off course, and 2) An exclamation point to his wants and needs.

    His greatest need is for me to feel submissive and safe in my submission to express it, not supress it. The broken rule/expectation is more than just the subject matter of the rule. To us, it is an indication I'm not where we want me to be. In Bonnie's post she talks about feeling feminine. Being on my Submissive Bullseye, has me feeling less guarded, and therefore more of everything else I find good about myself, and this allows me to give myself wholly not only to Barney but to others as well. It allows me to see the world from multiple sides. It allows me to be more patient and kind, and light hearted. I laugh out loud, so much sometimes I snort. I sleep well. I eat well. I take care of things in far greater detail, not because of rules, or fear of spanking or disappointing anyone, but because I am where I need to be with my submissive heartset.

    Does B spank sexually? No it is too confusing for me. Does he spank just for his fun and no other reason, yes. But those times help my submission as well. Does he reset when I am getting curt, not as much as he used to due to people being home a LOT this past year. Does he punish, yes but I don't feel bad about the act necessarily ( depends on his words ) but as Deena said, it brings us back to where we need to be. In our case because he wants me to feel submissive because that is what I want/need. That place tears down the barriers between us and allows us to 'just be'.

    As for Nora Jean, I am not entirely sure she'd want you to put 'credit' on her for running Canada at the moment. LOL. And I will express my desire here that she return to blogging as well!

    I hope you have an enlightening 3-way!

    willie

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    1. Willie,
      I am laughing. Okay, I guess I did call you out, but I didn't mean to in a negative way at all. I did, however, know that you would have something insightful and experienced to add here and I thank you for doing so.

      Some of you gals seem to just get this stuff on a different level. I think most of it is years of experience and being able to articulate it, but I think I struggle in part because of a life spent seeing most things either black or white. Prime example is this post.... for me, spanking = bad while no spanking = good in the ttwd world. Or so I thought. Role play is neither black or white for me, it's just a different category ..... Then there's the D/S....... I still have the need to put everything its spot, it seems. Too bad I don't feel that way about housekeeping. LOL

      Wow, is that interesting that B doesn't spank you sexually because it's too confusing to you.

      Man, your second has really resonated with me. You have definitely given me a lot to think about and reread, too, but I do not have a headache from it! LOL

      Haha about the 3 way. We'll see what we come up with and what is shareworthy so that all can participate here in blog land. That's kind of the idea of blog land, isn't it? Although some conversations are just fine to have in private, too.

      I did not stop to think that NJ would not want credit for running Canada right now. You are probably very right on that. I have the opinion that she runs her little town though. HA!

      Thanks for the conversation here, Willie. Hugs, Windy

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    2. " Wow, is that interesting that B doesn't spank you sexually because it's too confusing to you".

      I think this might tie into PK's post a bit? First off I don't identify as a spanko, which I wish I did because then life might be a little simpler, at least for B. ( Not that I think or feel that those who do identify as spankos are better or worse than anyone else. ) I know it must seem confusing to be a spanked wife who says they are not a spanko.

      For me it is a means to an end, pardon the pun. It is the dominance/power exchange I crave more than anything else. I can just as easily, if not more so be affected by B punishing me in other ways that have nothing to do with anything physical. It is all about breaking down barriers ( okay stubbornness at times) and allowing my authentic self to remerge in an environment I feel I can. So the "Whip 'n Dip" is confusing because spanking action is connected to Dominance/ power exchange for me. When he spanked and gave pleasure at the same time, it felt like we were on equal ground. Much like vanilla sex- for me. Sex is enjoyable, but it isn't a power exchange unless it IS *wink*. The spanking is game like, as is intended, but it short circuits my head and heart. Currently. Some day it may not, but 8 years in it still does. To further complicate things for you, B will set up 'sessions' for lack of a better word, as he hates it, and takes. He likes to mark me. He likes to spank, strike, bite, pinch whatever as tame examples, just because he can. I hate the feeling during, unless I hit subspace, but after my submission is through the roof, because he made me submit to something I don't find pleasure in FOR him.

      But back to spanking ..It isn't to say after he has spanked me either for punishment or reset he doesn't take what he wants after, and I am always more than willing in EVERY sense of the word, or sometimes just one way- but I arrived at the conclusion it was due to the Dominant interaction, the events surrounding and leading up to, the reason behind the action, that has caused the arousal, not the actual spanking its self.

      willie

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    3. Hey, Willie. I think I missed this whole comment until now. Duh. Sorry. Getting lost in my own thread! LOL

      You make some interesting points and are making me think. I already have a migraine, but you didn't cause it. :) Dominance and how it ties into spanking has got me thinking... and how dominance is tied to other things..... and it's not the spanking that causes the arousal, it's the reason. Off to think....... thanks for the dialogue! Hugs, Windy

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  8. WOW!! I should check back more often and more frequently!! seems to me you most definitely do not need a 3 way - you got a wonderful discussion going!!

    In the very near future I will post on my blog - referencing this blog and all the wonderful comments!!

    One question for you though before I trot off.... do you consider yourself a submissive or is your relationship more HOH???

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    1. Hi, MorningStar! Yeah, great discussion here, not really needed via 3 way email. Love it that so many are joining in here. Wonderful input here.

      I consider myself sexually submissive and wanting to be softer toward Storm outside the bedroom. He enjoys being sexually dominant and loves my submission in whatever form it pops up. He needs to do more HOH'y things though in my opinion and probably his, too. lol Does that answer your question?

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    2. right - get the sexually submissive bit....... BUT it's the HOH that hangs me up... I am trying to sort out the difference between HOH and a D/s relationship...... obviously Storm is referred to as "Head of Household" in an HOH relationship... what are you referred to as?? wifey? submissive??

      Forgive me -- but I think I have more questions than answers :) Gonna do a post about it on my blog..... see what feed back I get.......

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    3. In the Corbin's Bend series they used the term TiH - taken in hand for the submissive partner in the relationship. I refer back to Cassie and Tom the most because that's my ideal. He spanks because they both enjoy it, but while she does nearly anything she wants, true discipline come if she puts herself in danger or lies to her husband - the head of the family. It's his willingness to use real discipline when he things it's called for that shows the love and caring. I'll be posting about this soon too.

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    4. I think PK has one answer ... the man is HOH and the woman is TIH. I cracked up that you got taxes information when you looked up Head of Household on Google. ROFL !!! I consider myself submissive with Storm only, yes, and he's the dominant. We have it sexually, but working on it in our home and in our brains. Spanking is sexy to us and we do use it in a D/S context.... but we aim to make it domestic as well which is where the ttwd comes in. Hugs, Windy

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  9. Windy - I've now come full circle back to the original comment of yours that got me thinking... " Wait, really? You never think of being bad/naughty, having broken a rule as the reasons for being spanked? What in the world am I missing? Would love to hear more of your reasons and views on this!"

    I'm writing a response to this in my head .... I expect to have something firmed up by tomorrow -- if you have time and the inclination - I'd love to hear your response :)

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    1. Hey there, MorningStar. Yes, I would be happy to give you a response and look forward to what you want to share. Will it be here or on your blog or email? Hugs, Windy

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  10. Goodness!!! Now this is fascinating! And such fun to read! WTG Windy for such a thought provoking post!!!

    I loved reading it all and found some things for me to think about. I can't add anything because we are still "defining" things (?). I do know that the Sheriff is faster these days to stop things before they totally escalate. I also know that I asked him to spank to get me out of my head (a very dangerous place to be). He has stepped in a few times now (OUCH!) and it is very quick to get me to talk to him, especially when added with a time out. I find it "relaxing" which sounds so weird and wrong and totally unfeminist of me to say, but him being in charge and in control relaxes me. I like it. And really, that is all that matters. Labels are nothing except a way to try and explain it. All I care about is that he is focused, on me, on our relationship. He protects both.

    Hugs
    Boo

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    1. Hi, Boo! I was hoping you would find your way to this post and the wonderful conversation here in the comment section by the gals of blog land. No, you don't sound weird at all. None of us would think it's wrong or weird....we're just like you and crave the discipline, spanking, being and feeling safe and taken care of with our emotions. We get it. I'm glad to hear you are making some progress in your dd/ttwd relationship. Yay! Hugs, Windy

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  11. Hey Windy,
    Some people think the 51/49 in our name came from our ages but Eric and I have a 51%/49% relationship. I'm a very strong independent gal and he's very attracted to that. Though we've been all over the board with ttwd and spanking and the lifestyle; it's mostly a sexual game for us. My philosophy in life truly falls into the "you be you" category... as long as it doesn't force others to get involved when they don't want to. I hope you two continue to find and enjoy what works for you! Hugs. Amy

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    1. Hi, Amy! It's great you know exactly where you and Eric are at. I did know that it wasn't your ages, but rather your relationship. I agree with your "you be you" philosophy as long as there is consent. I look forward to the day when Storm and I see eye to eye on exactly where we're at regarding this whole spanking thing! lol Hugs, Windy

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