Is it all about the spanking?

 I am a spanko, no doubt, on the receiving end only.  Not that I really needed verification, but I got it  when we Potato Heads finally made it into the closet this past weekend.  Storm had me bending over naked while he was behind me with the Loopy Johnny.  He starts gently to warm me up.....and I just started getting turned on right away.  Probably because it's been a long time and that poor potato magnet is getting a work out with getting moved all over the refrigerator lately and he's probably pissed at both of us, wishes he would fall off and roll under the fridge to forever be left alone doing what he does best -- potatoing, whatever that means.   

 I have been questioning and examining some things lately about D/s and DD and where Storm and I have been, are, and might be headed.  I love the spanking for sure and even though it hurts, that's not the primary reason why I like it.  I am  discovering that my kinky relationship with Storm is NOT all about the spanking even though I think I may have blogged such a thing in the past.  Don't get me wrong, it's a big part, but like I said we've been looking around for other options as alternatives to spanking because our ttwd is evolving. Interestingly, the longer I am in blog land and getting to know readers and others bloggers, the more I am finding out that several people who practice ttwd are not crazy about the spankings like I am.  

For me, some form of spanking, whipping, etc. will always get my motor running. But, what about when it isn't meant to serve that sexual purpose?  I got in just a bit of trouble this weekend while we were discussing future protocols that don't have anything to do with spanking.  Specifically, we were discussing the possibility of some kind of a morning ritual.  The setting up and implementing and going forward with the whole ttwd communication thing frustrates me as you know from my TTWD Magnification post.   So I got impatient with Storm for sounding like he was asking me something instead of what I felt he should have been doing - telling me.   So off into the closet we went.  Yes, this is where I was just spanked 2 nights ago as referred to in the first paragraph, but that was more for a reconnect and to jump start our ttwd again and it turned sexy. Almost every time we have ever spanked, Storm receives sexual gratification and most times I do, too. But, not this time, which makes this spanking unique. 

 It wasn't anywhere near the worst one I have ever received, but it was the first time in all our ttwd years that he said, "We're going in the closet," and took me in there, told me to bend over, pulled my pants down himself, and whipped away for having been impatient with him.  Well, hello, to you, Sir.  I was a bit miffed, but not much more than a little pouty afterwards.  He let me lie there and think about it afterward while he stared down at me, I presume. I could feel him standing over me, but I was hiding my face in a pillow, so I couldn't see him.  And then, I just got up and decided not to make a big fuss.  He hugged me and I thought about stiff arming him for half a second then remembered he told me that I have to hug him back even when I am mad, so I did.  Then he told me two things, "I love you. And you love me." ( Okay, Barney the Dinosaur, and NO, I did not say that!  Laughing.)  He didn't trust me to say it back to him in that moment, I think.  He had to be feeling vulnerable, too, having just asserted his authority in a way he has never done before then.  (Spanking as part of role affirmation, mixed with maybe being disrespectful, mixed with me showing my submission has happened many times, as you know.  But, this time as explained above is a first. And it felt different, did not turn me on, and it wasn't meant to.) 

I also had to pay the price today for being naughty the other night.  It was Monday night, after a great weekend.  Both Storm and I were in the kitchen winding down almost ready to go to bed and I just happened to realize that the potato magnet had been on the freezer part all day long, which meant I was feeling well physically for more than 24 hours at time.  Woo! Hoo!  And just as I was explaining that to Storm, it hit me.  He had not taken me in the closet at all that day....... we had all day, in between work and other things, but plenty of time for a quick minute or two for him to feel me up or want to look at my butt or whatever he wants to do in that closet.  I wasn't disappointed that there was no spanking because we had just done that over the weekend.  But, it upset me that he hadn't taken the liberties with me that he has absolute permission to when I am feeling well.  I asked him why ...... silence.   And I just said, "Please do not do this to me already.  We just started again......."   He didn't have much to say other than if he said anything it would sound like excuses.  I was hurt.  

Obviously upset, I finished whatever I was doing, got ready for bed and crawled in the bed with my panties ON.  I waited for him to come to bed.  The next thing I knew, he was standing at the side of the bed where I was lying and said, "Let's go in the closet."  I almost didn't.  I got up and went in there anyway, turned around when he came in and I saw that he had the Loopy Johnny in his hand.  I flipped out.  "Are you kidding me?  I'm in trouble when you're the one who hurt me by not following through?  I wasn't disrespectful at all.  I'm just hurt."  And I started to cry a bit.  I didn't know what to do.  Do I let him spank me because I've given prior permission for him to use his discretion?  "You're going to hurt me (okay just sting my butt a bit), and that is all it will be is just pain and nothing else because I know you aren't even going to tell me WHY you're doing this.  I don't know how you think that is going to solve anything."  He said, "We needed to come in the closet to work through this. You are not in trouble. We're just working through this."  Pffftt.  That made zero sense to me and I said so.  He repeated, "You're not in trouble."  I realized that I was interfering with his judgment at a crucial moment in our TTWD, so I admitted, "Well, I will be when you find out what I did."  He looked at me and then rubbed his head with one hand.  "Behind my back?"   Me, "Yes."  Again, he put his hand to his head and rubbed.  "What did you do?"  The fight left me, "I took the potato magnet completely off the fridge/freezer.  He's gone."   As he stood there, he immediately and loudly dropped the Loopy Johnny on the carpet on purpose.  Oh, shit. I forgot that it means I am telling him that I am not feeling well, which is stupid of me because that is the point of the entire thing.

So I decided to sit down since we were probably going to be in there a while and he sat down with me.  He asked me what I did with it.  And I just started laughing and could not stop.  And then he started laughing at me as he is asking me, "Is he in the toilet?"  I shake my head no and continue to laugh because I can't speak.  "Did you throw him across the street to the golf course?"  I shook my head 'no', but laughed harder because I had seriously thought about it when I first took him off the fridge when Storm had turned away. I then held it in my fist for about 15 minutes as I layed in bed waiting for him and I decided what to do.   Finally, I was able to say, "I put him under your pillow."   He wanted to know, "Why?"  I said, "It's not my fault you didn't know it was missing.  You're the one that didn't look.  So if you went to sleep on it all night, that's your problem."   So we laughed some more, then things got serious.  We stood and he held me and said he was so sorry he hurt my feelings, that he'd had a very busy day with work, which I knew was true.  He said, "I'm not spanking tonight."  All the gas was out of him and then I felt really bad.  

We got in bed again, me without my panties this time like I am supposed to and spooned.  We talked softly for a while about all that had happened.  I knew dog gone well that I should be spanked because of the whole potato thing because I did it on purpose.  I took it off the fridge in hopes he would see that and come after me.... or something.  I don't know.  I seriously thought about throwing him to the golf course, and yes, even though I am old, my softball arm can still chuck objects quite far.  But, I didn't want to lose the little guy as I quite like the idea of him helping us with our TTWD.   I asked Storm if I could have permission to say something and he said yes.  I asked that tomorrow, would he take some time to think if I should be in trouble or not for hiding the magnet.  He said, "Yes. You were naughty."  I apologized.  We kissed and fell asleep. 

The next day was a very busy day from morning until well after 10 pm, so I knew not to ask Storm any questions.  Then Wednesday came along.  After an hour or so of being in the kitchen doing whatever, he came to get me and said we're going in the closet.  I stripped, bent over, and he started whipping me with the LP and lectured me, which is something he has often struggled with.  Well, not this time, folks!   I knew exactly why my ass was bare, but he reminded me anyway.  He also set new parameters on what I was and was not allowed to do with our potato magnet system.  

This post is all about the spanking, but it isn't all about the sexual spanking, which is an extremely important ttwd milestone for us this past week.  Twice.   I wonder what other slight but significant detours we'll soon be taking.........

 

The Magnification of TTWD

I have said several times on my blog that ttwd has caused more conflict for Storm and me than it has solved and I felt guilty every time I felt it and the once or twice here where I wrote it.  I don't recall ever hearing or reading that other ttwd wives might have felt the same thing, so I thought I was alone in this.  And it feels awful.  Who knew it would take almost 3 years of blogging to finally have it jump right out at me when I wasn't even looking for it?

One of our fellow bloggers who can claim this quote if she chooses to, once wrote, "I will admit at times it seems to have caused strife between the two of us, but as I have said before, ttwd is more of a magnifier of issues that already exist more than it is a problem unto itself.  Ttwd has allowed me to unearth myself; my true, authentic self, and even in the future if for some reason we can no longer live this lifestyle that knowledge and feeling will never be taken away."

First, I almost fell out of bed because she said that first sentence.  Then, every time I read it again, I tear up because the raw emotion of what she revealed in that short paragraph is filled with honesty, vulnerability, and it's a testament to how hard it is for a ttwd couple to keep it going.  It's quite profound to me. 

Previously, I have felt like I couldn't say this. Storm and I were living it, but when I tried to talk about it, especially when I first started blogging, then a comment or two would come in saying I needed to be thankful that my husband spanks me...... that he does this for me because it's my need.   Oh my gosh, I cannot tell you how damaging that was.  I felt chastised.  I bawled my eyes out. Storm and I are trying to figure things out and I'm not allowed to be honest here that the spanking he just gave left me feeling frustrated?  When he directly told me that I can and he needs to know!?  (Although I should be allowed to say it here whether he expressly told me I could or not because this is the place for it. Isn't it?)  I mean, it's my vulnerable bare ass bent over the bed for his viewing pleasure and he's watching all googly-eyed the cellulite bouncing around and he's probably marveling at the physics of it all after each impact, being the science buff that he is, so it's pleasing him in some manner.  Hmph. 

It's not like I am in the closet arguing with him and nick picking.  It was communication, you know that thing that everybody says is so needed in ttwd, but rarely will anyone give an actual example of a real conversation?   How is that helpful?   I love all of us who have ever been in blog land (no, I don't and the feeling is mutual), but sometimes we suck.  I swear if I was Roz or Boo and had to read how many times a blogger said the word communication without giving a real life example as to how to do that with ttwd, I'd have just started leaving swear words all over the internet.  Laughing.

Okay so back to the quote...... ttwd magnifies problems we already had? 

 I did not know this because Storm and I have always gotten long really well.  We hang, we're buds, and we play sports, he reads and I fish, he cleans the fish, I cook the fish, he eats the fish. He likes my titties.  I like to show him my titties.   How could we have had a communication problem all along and somehow we didn't know it? 

 Well, the more I thought about the possibility of that, I think it is at least partly true.  I find my husband difficult to communicate with. He is a self-disciplined man and his upbringing taught him to put his needs last.  Well, okay, so he is an unselfish person, but everybody has needs, right?  Nope, he felt sharing his with me, his wife, were selfish.  It took a third party within the past year to discuss this with us and to tell him that it was not selfish to have your healthy needs met.  Because I'm not an idiot, I figured out what some of his need were in the vanilla side of our marriage because some are common to many and sex is a big one.  But, he wasn't expressing to me what his unique needs might be and our ttwd brought that to light in a big way.

 As you have either experienced or imagined, if the dominant person in the relationship isn't going to assert himself, make some rules, say what displeases or pleases him or express his basic needs, then DD isn't going to work very well.  In contrast, the D/s parts of us have worked well in the past probably because Storm has no problem being dominant sexually, but some of our practices were put up on the shelf when I started blogging.  Coincidence?  Maybe.  More of a personal feeling of just wanting to get the DD part of things right?  Somewhat.  Pressure whether perceived or manifested to "stay in the ttwd/dd zone"  from others?  Somewhat.  Ultimately my own fault?  Yep.  Ironically, I think the sexual elements of the D/s parts of our ttwd relationship is what has been holding us together this whole time because we suck at the DD.  

Here is an example at sucking at the DD part because I was complaining earlier about bloggers not giving specifics:  Do we have a problem of him not noticing when I am disrespectful?  Yes.  Is that new since practicing ttwd? Nah, bra.  (What's bra?  The feminine version of bro.) Well, Windy, why don't you just be nice and respectful in the first place?  Don't wanna. Because home is where you let out all the crap thrown at ya in life all day long ...... doesn't make it right, but when you feel like your skin is peeled back and your nerves are right there on the surface........ yeah, I am agitated.  So I am irritated and he isn't calling me out on it.  That definitely existed way before we ever heard about domestic discipline, but ttwd magnifies it for sure.  

Daughters Know - The Friendship Laugh

As with many of you, according to your posts and comments throughout our little pocket of the internet, the past year has brought a ton of stress and has changed the way many of us are living our lives.  Throw in the prior year of existing problems and for me, it makes one giant stomach ache.  I can't go to the doctor because we can't get our vaccines yet and I cannot expose myself because of my severe asthma.  So, I am doing the all natural and home remedy thing.  Unfortunately, my adult daughter was very ill with stomach issues a handful of years ago and she knows the kind of pain and issues that I am dealing with and she feels for me.  She's trying to give me tips on what to eat and what not to eat (like I wasn't the one trying to feed her by the spoonful at the worst of times 6 years ago and don't know the ingredients IN EVERYTHING.)  But, it is sweet of her and instead of saying, "I know," I let her have her moment of wanting to take care of her mom.

She was lecturing me on stress.  "Mom, the past 2 years have been horribly stressful for you.  Tomorrow, let me work with you on your Chakras ....."  Hey, I'm game.  "You need to heal." (We are Christians, but we also believe in medicine, science, acupuncture, and the kinds of things that calm a person down like yoga and meditation. We're mutts, I guess. We don't care how what happened when, we just believe God made it all. She and Storm understand the science whereas I do not, nor do I care.)  LOL  Anyway,  I had gotten up out of bed late at night Donald Duckin' it with just my t-shirt and no panties and she was up studying in the kitchen.  Me, "I gotta heat up my heating pad; don't look at my ass."   She just laughs and then I turned around and she was holding her arms out to me for a hug.  She is her own woman and she needs her personal space respected as we all do, so this isn't rare, but it also isn't everyday with this specific intention.   Me, "I don't have any pants on!  And my snatch is like right here, too."  Her, "I'm pretty sure that when I hug anybody, I don't grab them by the ass or the snatch."  Laughing.  I love this kid. 

She names a few things that she knows have been extremely hurtful to me in the past 2 years ..... I barely survived Christmas time and afterward, my stomach started paying for it.   Me, "Well, I've been not watching the news this week and instead, I am talking with friends and I made a new friend with this gal who let's me be human and makes me laugh a lot."  She smiled softly, tilted her head knowingly to one side and said, "I know, I can tell the difference in you." I asked what she meant, "You're writing. You're happier.  And that kind of laugh only comes from one place--friendship."  My heart.  Smart kid. 

I think when the kids are little, we know they're watching us, but when they're all grown up, we forget that they still are.  I have been mostly a good example for her in the way I treat my friends and family, but she knows I've taken a lot of personal hits and that I often just absorb the blows and don't lash back. (Not talking about Storm. He only hurts my feelings on accident.)  She is VERY protective of me, which I love.  There are people who were/are in my life that frankly, she expressed to me that they were and are complete b*tches, which has meaning and merit because she's an empath.  As a result, she has occasionally seen my tears, but it's wonderful to know that she also recognizes the organic laugh that is generated when I am communicating with my girl friends. 

We are all daughters and remember our mothers.  Some of us still have them, some of us don't.  Some of them took great care of us.  Others required us as daughters to take care of them, which is fine when they're elderly and need help, but a child should never have to take care of a parent's emotional needs.  It's my responsibility with my daughter to guide her by example, to speak to her in love even when she is being unreasonable, to lift her up, to tuck her into bed on vulnerable nights no matter how old she is if she wants it, to adsorb the emotional and mental difficulties that may come her way.  A  mom should never shame her daughter (or son), say hurtful things, but apologize when we do ........ We must be proactive in our efforts to never hold the hurt they cause us for too long.  It will always be my job and my joy even through life changing difficulties to help her reach her life's goals and to push her toward independence when necessary and hold on tightly when she just needs a mother's touch, love, and ear.  But, every once in a while, my daughter shows how much she has truly been looking out for me day in and day out and it surprises me when she comes to my defense and also lectures me.   But, I am really, really happy that she sees I have a couple of steady, healthy friendships and despite the fact that I've had my heart ripped in two by friends and loved ones, that I still have the healthy desire and am willing to take yet another vulnerable risk with new gals to begin and build anew.  

How do you feel when your daughter(s) or son(s) or a loved one is looking out for you when you're not expecting it?   What kinds of emotions do you think they sense in you?

A Kiss on the Wiener

Last year during a Valentine's Day discussion, my mom asked me what Storm got me.  I told her that I received chocolate covered strawberries, pineapple hearts, and a nice card. I did not get him anything because the fruit is a lot and he enjoys eating that with me, so it's kind of like a Valentine's "for us" type gift.  Storm enjoys cards, but not as much as most of us gals do, plus we had birthdays last month and exchanged mushy cards then.   So I told my mom that what I gave him for Valentine's Day was, "A kiss on the wiener," which he would take over a sappy card any day of the week!  Those of you who read here know that I mean much more than that, and my mom probably does, too, which is why she said something like, "Oh, Lord Jesus, come get me now! I don't want to know this!" 

I started laughing and my mom was shaking her head.  So I continued, "Ma, you should know that sometimes it's just easier that way.  It's quicker......."   She is laughing and saying, "I don't want to hear about it." Me, "I'm not giving you details."

This brings me to a transition in my mind regarding a very short story about my mom telling me where oral sex originated.  First of all, I am thinking that Adam and Eve probably did it, so "The Garden" is most likely the correct answer.  Or maybe it was the snakes back when they had legs.  But, when I was a teenager, for some reason I was asking my mom something about it.  She thought it was disgusting and said that, "It came from overseas." Okay, I was pretty sure, even in the late 80's that wasn't politically correct.  I sat there with a puzzled look on my face.  "What?" 

"The men brought it back from the war they were fighting....... "   I assumed she meant Vietnam.   I don't know if I believed her then, but even if I did, it wasn't for very long.   I told Storm about this and said that I don't see why any human being, no matter what country he/she is from, could not have easily come up with oral sex on their own.   Storm agreed.

Decades passed to last Valentine's Day where this post begins. This conversation with my mom made me want to know if my dad thought the same thing as my mom because usually when one has a whacked out opinion on something, so does the other.  I walked over to where my dad was sitting and I asked him where oral sex came from.  He didn't hesitate and answered matter of fact,  "Overseas."  I died laughing.  Same answer and same politically incorrect description. "You think no one in America or the rest of the world for that matter ever thought of oral sex?" I asked as I just walked away shaking my head. 

Also, when I was a teenager and asking my mom about sex, she told me with a straight face to never have intercourse in the water because you'd get stuck together.  I could not tell if she was teasing me or not because she wasn't laughing.  I told her that I was calling my godmother on the phone to ask her. (they were best friends)  She said go ahead, so I did.  My godmother laughed, but also told me the truth.  "No, you and your husband do no get stuck together if you have sex under water.........."

We've honestly never tried, but not because we were afraid we would get stuck together.  We were afraid I'd get pregnant. (no birth control)

This year Valentines was a little different.  I splurged a bit and ordered a variety of chocolate and caramel goodies for Storm. I gave them to him Friday night so we could start snacking and have a Valentines weekend!  He is very happy with the assortment.  On Saturday, he presented me with what he had ordered for me - some special cheesecakes with chocolate covered strawberries on top.  And he chose a card that had two cartoon hearts on it both with arms and legs.  He wanted to tell me why he chose that particular card.  "The male heart is standing behind the female heart, but he's grabbing her boobs." (Why, yes, he is, indeed.)  "And the girl heart has her hands behind her back because she is giving him a reach-round!"  (She did  have her hand right where his wiener would be!) 🍆

Happy Valentine's Day!

Mr. Potato Head

The trouble with not having an actual list of rules to follow is that all of our interactions are always open to Storm's interpretation.  Because he's a guy and I am a girl (and personalities differ) , we often have different interpretations of what happened and if there should be consequences.   One rule that I forgot we had when I wrote the Bare Butt post was that I am NOT allowed to call Storm names.  I don't mean like assshole or whatever.  I don't do that within ear shot <grin> (and if you think I am going to tell on myself, pffft!)   But, let's say he is wearing a graphic T with JungleBook characters on it.  I may call him, "Baloo the Bear."  I really don't get what the big deal is, but he often doesn't like it.  So this upsets him, but if I am rude to him about something else or if I smart off (imagine that!), he often doesn't even notice or think it's a big deal.  That doesn't make sense to me.  For the name calling thing, he explained that when I call him by a character on his shirt, it is about the TONE I use.  So, if I am flirting with him and say, "Want to hug me, Baloo you big bear?" that is okay with him.  But, if he is restocking the bathroom with toilet paper and I say, "You got enough paper there to get the job done, Baloo?" then that isn't okay. (Perhaps I am just really concerned because he's quite hairy.)   Laughing.  It's ridiculous to me, but hey, if it bothers him, then I am making an effort.  But, heck yes, I still say stuff on purpose to him.  I just have to be prepared to pay the consequences.  :)  

So, our dd and whether or not my smart mouth gets noticed, called out, spanked, etc, is  undefined and it's all up to Storm.  He has my consent ahead of time.  However, he struggles with letting me off the hook and giving me the benefit of the doubt way too often.  Many times he is not sure how I am physically feeling and that affects my mood and my ability to handle certain things, so it makes him hesitate.  He would feel horrible for calling me out when I am ill.  And I have chronic health issues so he's constantly having to try to ask me how I am feeling so that he can read the situation accurately.  It's difficult for him to do.  This has caused us both a lot of frustration.  This has caused us both a lot of frustration.  Yes, I said that sentence twice.  The math girl in me would say (This has caused ME a ton of frustration) ^1000.  (That's a lot of frustration.  This ass is not going to spank itself.) 

As luck would have it recently (or we may have had a huge fight, you guess), Storm came up with an idea, which I really think is great because he put the effort into thinking how to solve this problem.  HE's gotta figure it out ........ it has to organically come from him and NOT ME, otherwise I just can't wrap my head around it.  (I can't lead the way for him to lead the way.)

Back to his idea.  Everybody has refrigerator magnets, right?  Well, we had a 3 inch red magnet shaped like a couch at one time, with 3 potato head people magnets sitting on said couch magnet.  Over the years, all the pieces have gone missing except for Storm's potato head that is bald with glasses.  They're probably under the refrigerator itself, but I refuse to pull it out from the wall. I don't want to know what is even under there.  I have a hard enough time keeping the visible parts of the house clean, I'm certainly not worried about a hidden place.  So either they're under there, or I threw them away because they kept falling off the freaking fridge every time we opened it too hard and even though I had never heard of Marie Kondo or whatever the flip her name is, I was smart enough to know that those magnet pieces did not spark joy.  Spark my anger for falling on the floor, yes. Anyway, what is left is just a random magnet on the fridge now that no one pays attention to.  Storm's idea is that if I am feeling okay physically, then I go over to Mr. Potato Head and place him anywhere on the freezer top.  If I am not feeling well, then I put him lower on the refrigerator door.   This is Storm's cue as to if he can act upon coming to find me, wherever I am in the house, and immediately taking me into the closet in our bedroom to do with me and unto me as he pleases.  Sex, blow job, spanking, etc. Whoa Nilly, did THAT get my attention!!! 

So he proposed this idea when I wasn't feeling well, but as I began to feel better each day, I contemplated on where to put Mr. Potato Head.  I had to prepare myself for the consequences, be they sexy or spanky.  So three days later, I am feeling just fine.  I am hyper aware that Storm is scoping out that fridge like a hawk and the minute that I move the potato, he's gonna be all over me in some way. 

I eased over to the fridge and put him on the top part indicating all systems go.  Within 5 minutes, he came out of his office and I saw him scope out the refrigerator.  I started to run.  He chased me, but I made it back to the potato and put him back on the bottom part of the refrigerator before Storm caught me.  Laughing.  Yeah, that was just me teasing him and I put the magnet back up, which meant we went straight to the closet!   And boy did some hot stuff ensue in there for the next half hour or so.  I didn't get spanked, but I haven't been naughty and Storm has been ready for some kind of sex.  We enjoyed a long awaited sexy time in there and I think this Mr. Potato Head thing is going to work.  Although I am nervous about the first time he takes me in there for a spanking.  I don't know why I get nervous after so many years of ttwd.  However, I forgot to tell you that he said he's going to step up his game and that he needs my absolute promise that I will use my safeword if he was stepping it up too much.  Looks like Mr. Potato head might make mashed potatoes out of my ass!

The Bare Butt Rule

 I've been meaning to write about this for a long time...... over a year, but as you know, I haven't been blogging as much as I want to, so I'm just now making a point to stop and do it already.  As you also know if you read here much, Storm and I don't really have rules to our dd.  There isn't very much that makes him unhappy and although I want to be led and be held accountable, we aren't comfortable with a list of Do's and Don'ts.   Every once in a while, we revisit that discussion to see how we're feeling about it.  

Storm has become more comfortable in telling me not necessarily his needs, but I phrased it as  something he could relate to.  What would he enjoy?  What is something that would show my submission to him, help me feel submissive, and him dominant? The easiest place for us to do that is in the bedroom.   During one of our to rule or not to rule discussions, I happened to tell him about the ladies in blog land that sleep nekkid.  To my knowledge, most of you who do that do so because you always have and as far as I know, it's not a rule for anyone.  So for a while, I tried to sleep naked off and on to see how it feels.  It turns out that I cannot sleep well when I am completely nude.  I don't know exactly how it came about, but I tried just sleeping in a top with no bottoms.  Turns out, I sleep just fine like that.  Storm LOVES it.  So it became a rule, and yes, he checks every night, and many nights, I am cheeky about it.  I wrap myself up in the quilt and tuck it under me so that when he comes to bed, I am rolled up like a burrito and if he wants to find out if I am following the Bare Butt Rule, he's got some physical work ahead of him in order to do so.   Most nights, I just snuggle up to him spoon style and he gets handsy.  My favorite thing about it is that I love the feeling of his rough hand on my hip as we relax and fall asleep.  It's sexy and sweet.   

So we're not butt sex people, which I think I've made known here before.  Laughing.  But, sometimes, when Storm is feeling my bum as we cuddle at night it leads to interesting activities as he wonders way down underneath.  However, the other night he was just kind of rubbing my cheeks and the top of my bum crack, but then he surface over my dirt button.  I thought he did it on accident, so I didn't say anything.  Well, about the third time he passed over it, I got worried for the following reason:  Recently, he has been moving more in his sleep because he's dreaming.  I have woken him up a couple of times because his hands were clenching or his arm was jerking as if he were in a fight.  So on the third pass, I was like, "Hey!  You better be careful with your fingers there just in case you have a dream tonight that you're eating Kentucky Fried Chicken!"  He laughed, "Because it's finger licking good?"  Gross, but yes.  "I'll take my chances," he decides.  And, no Storm is not a Booty Eater, whatever that is.  Laughing.  It's a person that trolls Parler and Gab and other crazy right wing social media users on purpose and then he or she reports back to Twitter  what he or she has found.  

Anyway, we're still going strong with The Bare Butt Rule for over a year now.  I haven't been spanked for not coming to bed bare butt because I almost always do unless I have a valid excuse of not feeling well, etc.  I do feel a bit like Winnie the Pooh and Porky Pig at night when I get up to go to the bathroom and I have on only a t-shirt and no panties, but I'm okay with it.